1. You know a haystack has nothing to do with actual hay.
It’s your favorite lunch, stacked high with lettuce, tomatoes, beans, veggie chili, cheese and globs and globs of sour cream.
3. All of your best jokes were about Ellen G. White.
Except when your parents were around, because they would be pissed if they knew your were joking about Ellen G. White.
4. And every once in a while you threw in a joke about “The Great Disappointment.”
5. You were once an Adventurer and Pathfinder.
“Girl Scout? What’s that?”
6. PSR is forever tied to your memories of summer camp, sixth-grade camp, and any and all church retreats.
7. You were either born here, went to school here, or are currently working here.
8. You attended ____________ Adventist Academy from K-12.
Insert the name of your city.
9. Piercing your ears made you an absolute rebel.
Pierced ears = badventist.
12. Anytime you saw this, you knew you wouldn’t be able to watch it.
Don’t forget Sabbath starts on sundown Friday.
13. Until the “advent” of iTunes, this is where you did all your music shopping.
15. You never had a real prom.
Because obviously dancing wasn’t allowed.
So instead you had a themed “banquet” where your entertainment was typically some kind of juggler.
16. Because of the no dancing rule, this is the basic extent of your dancing skills.
17. When it came time to pick a college, these were your basic choices:
18. And if you were a real rebel, you went here for a semester:
19. 99% of your friends are studying to become a doctor, nurse, med-tech, or pharmacist.
21. Your parents probably have around 15 of these stashed away somewhere.
24. You knew that every 13th Sabbath you could expect this:
Don’t worry it’s just grape juice.
25. And this:
Although you and your friends were always conveniently busy during foot-washing.
26. Your pantry probably looks something like this.
Veggie meat for days!
27. At every party, graduation, or wedding you went to Martinelli’s was the drink of choice.
28. Although technically speaking you were a strict vegetarian, you always found it hard to resist pepperoni.
Which you conveniently forgot was pork.
29. Your favorite Adventist factoid was that Kellogg’s was founded by Seventh-day Adventists as an alternative to the unhealthy foods of the day.
30. Though, ironically enough, Little Debbie’s was also founded by Seventh-day Adventists.