1. In a serious and dignified manner, a teacher or principal calls this class “the finest class to ever walk these halls.”
They get better every year.
2. A mom gets touched when a dad cries.
Like a good guy-cry isn’t totally a thing.
3. An authority figure mispronounces a name.
5. Someone makes a joke about “plastics.” Parents, that movie is about a college graduate.
6. Some wacky graduating senior makes a non sequitur.
7. Every joke gets a huge laugh.
8. In the heat of the moment, people use awfully strong language!
“Forever.” “Best.” It bears repeating: “Finest.”
9. A teacher uses the phrase “lifelong learner.”
10. Someone’s older sibling snorts after overhearing a teenager say, “We’ll keep in touch!”
Haters gonna hate.
11. People talk a lot about dreams.
12. Seniors will hear about “the real world,” because I guess teenagers are just making that whole “high school” thing up.
The last few years? Nah, you imagined that.
13. Adults walk around with their high expectations showing.
NO PRESSURE OR ANYTHING.
14. Someone gets fed up with platitudes and lays down some truth.
15. A speech contains a metaphor about a dandelion.
We are so this dandelion.
16. This metaphor will expand to involve wind.
17. Suddenly overcome by emotion, someone will have to stop talking for a moment.
18. A senior really isn’t impressed.
19. Another senior is way too cool for all this pomp and circumstance.
20. At least three people screw the pooch on what should be a straightforward handshake.
21. A speech is long.
22. Really long.
23. No one can explain the rules of the tassle.
Where does it go, yo? No one knows.
24. If someone doesn’t trip on the way to the stage, you’re doing something wrong.
25. Everyone with a camera tries to snap a pic of the caps in the air. All of these will come out blurry.