1. You've been referring to young people as "youths" since you were, like, 10.
Eighth graders, everywhere!
2. You're aware that being told you have an "old soul" is a kind way of saying "you act like my grandpa."
3. You wish you were old and wealthy enough to afford a house with a lawn so you could yell at kids to stay off it.
4. You're not getting older; your age is just catching up to you.
5. You bring a sweater everywhere.
6. You've wiped some schmutz off a friend's face.
7. You honestly love Werther's Originals.
8. You have asked "is it weird to go to bed at 9" as a "joke."
9. "A night out" = 6 o'clock wine date, followed by immediately getting sleepy
Cheese in various forms is often also involved.
10. Also, you're forever being told that you're two months late to every meme.
11. Also also, you're on Facebook.
12. You're really into blankets and quilts and snuggling under various blankets and quilts.
13. You can only understand about half of what youths are saying.
14. The idea of going to a club sounds like a punishment.
15. You're quite a fan of the phrase "kids these days."
16. ... And letting people about five years younger than you are know what it was like "in your day."
And the most telling sign of all...
17. You say "I'm old" a whole bunch.
