I can’t believe I’m the first person to point out that this is clearly being secretly marketed at massively obese people.

It’s utterly brilliant! Who would want to touch fresh, sanitary toilet paper when they could grab onto a germ-infested butt-bat?

i’m guessing these sort of people who buy this never have sex either…..not without a device to touch all those ‘dirty things’……

“Toilet paper’s so archaic…” That’s why you should wipe yourself with something on the end of a stick, just like in ancient Rome!

I read that headline wrong. I thought that you could HIRE someone to wipe your ass for you.  Well, on Craigslist you probably could.

“Who the hell folds toilet paper? Have I been doing something wrong for decades? Meh.” Dude are you serious? The only people who don’t fold the toilet paper into neat squares are uncivilized savages.  Do you just grab toilet paper and bunch it up? what are you an ape? I wouldn’t be able to shake your hand if I met you.

Whatever; this is just another pointless step, still archaic and crude. When will everyone realize the simple elegance and utility of the three seashells?

The fat guy says that being “big” has it’s “advantages…and disadvantages.” What exactly are the advantages of being too fat to wipe your own ass?

I needed one of these shit sweepers when I had my gallbladder removed. Where were you then, Comfort Wipe?

Who the hell folds toilet paper? Have I been doing something wrong for decades? Meh.

Think about it. With an extra 18 inches of reach, you could wipe just about anybody’s ass. Sign me up!