10 Things Every Kid Who Went To Shul Remembers

Because we don't roll on Shabbos!

1. When you get there and everyone is checking out your outfit

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and you are checking out theirs

2. When you make a beeline for the candy man

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The only time it's acceptable to take candy from some old dude

3. When the rabbi starts talking

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and you're into the 45th minute of his speech about sacrifices during the second temple era

4. Being told you have to go to Teen Minyan

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Because you're too old for this shit

5. Getting to go back into shul and sit with your mom or dad

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and being told you have to participate if you want to stay there

6. Genuinely trying to daven for like five minutes

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then giving up

7. Wondering what kiddush club is all about

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and wondering why you can't go too

8. Sneaking out of shul to go flirt outside

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and ending up just talking to your regular friends

9. Hearing Adon Olam and knowing the end is near

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Wrap it up people

10. Making the mad dash for the sponsored kiddush food

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Did someone say chocolate chip AND m&m cookies?!

What's your best memory from shul as a kid?