11 Things Desi/South Asian People Will Understand About #growingupdesi

Obvs desis are awesome and there are very unique experiences that connect us across countries and continents. Here are just few examples of what growing up desi was like. Please add to this list in the comments section!

1. Spice Matters

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Our food is delicious. The spices and flavourings are to do die for. As such it's completely acceptable and normal for us to carry around chilies or achaar (pickle) or even ghee to make food taste right.

2. Wait, what's a musical?

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I'm sorry I don't understand. You have an entirely different word for a film that has music and dancing, as well as acting in it? We just call that Bollywood baby. #booyah

3. We are hella into the community

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Your whole life will be dictated by 'the community' and what they deem is acceptable. Who is this community? Don't know. How do they help? Don't know. Why do they matter? Don't know. But you either need to do as they say or move away from home. Those are really your only two options.

4. You have 5 options for a major at college

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There are only five acceptable majors/career choices: medicine/pharmacy, engineering, law, business, and IT. Everything else is an absolute waste of time and will be referred to as either 'crapology' or 'a Mickey Mouse degree'.

5. You can drink but you CANNOT eat pork. Ever. Eh. Verrr.

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So this one might be reserved for just the Muslim desis (wait, who's going to admit to actually being Muslim these days?). We may be ok with drinking even if we're not supposed to but there's an invisible line and if you actually eat pork, you have more than crossed that line. You can get sh*tfaced on your lunch hour and go back to the office and deliver a presentation to your CEO and then puke all over her (that's right, the boss is a woman) and that massive client that's flown in from NYC and that's ok. Eating pork, however, is going just a little too far.

6. 30 is old.

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If you're not married by the time you're 30, forget your happiness being at stake. The real tragedy, and the one you won't stop hearing about, is that your parents have failed. Forget that they never talked to you about relationships or intimacy. It is your job to (secretly and without them finding out) find a mate, enter into a healthy and lasting relationship, and then give them grandchildren. Good luck!

7. Tags like 'cousin' and 'brother-in-law' are for white people

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Did you ever try and explain family relations to white friends growing up? Like why your 'brother' was actually your cousin and why everyone and their mother (literally) was your auntie? It's still fun messing with people like that.

8. Our mums know English... sort of.

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So our mums know English and speak it very well. But for some reason, when we go to restaurants with them and the waiter asks them what they want, they pretend they don't understand. Why? Why? WHY??? And then you end up ordering for them and you seem like a controlling, abusive child. Why Mama, why?

9. We recycle everything

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Desis invested recycling FO SHO. Have you ever seen a desi mum throw something away without thinking about how it could be repurposed? Like a yoghurt container is cleaned out and then reused as tupperware. Or your clothes, which have been handed down from the 80s. Or your curtains, which are from the 70s. Your furniture doesn't have to be replaced though because that's had plastic on it since the 60s.

10. Hair

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Ok so I don't understand evolution at all. We live on like the hottest, most humid Subcontinent in the entire galaxy and we are all (yes, us ladies too) covered in hair! Like from our heads all the way down to our very hairy toes (sandal season is a bitch). Dehairing literally takes up 60% of desi women's time and now that manscaping is big, I'm guessing desi guys don't have a lot of spare time either. #bringbackhairy

11. You are never too old for a verbal or actual ass whopping

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So you have a PhD now or run a multimillion dollar company (well obviously, you're desi)? If you do something wrong, your parents DO NOT care who you are, where you are, how much you make, how old you are, or how many kids you have. They will de-pep your step so quickly you will feel like your 9 again. So watch yourself. Always.

Share your own experiences with us of #growingupdesi