10 Mistakes Guys Make In Relationships

Not everything can be chalked up to girls being too needy, clingy or even straight up annoying. So guys, here are 10 mistakes that you make in relationships. (By: Victoria Robertson, University of Illinois)

1. Being too serious.

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While this isn’t one of the most common mistakes guys will make, it’s still made often enough, and, let me tell you, it’s a major turnoff. While girls appreciate a guy that has a serious side, we like to have fun too.

We don’t constantly want to have to act adult, and we shouldn’t have to. If we want to watch "Spongebob" on a Saturday afternoon instead of grocery shop, you should be more than happy to comply.

2. Not being serious enough.

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While it is fun to have fun, not everything is meant to be a joke. Some things are meant to be serious, and girls need to know that you’re capable of acting mature enough in certain settings.

When you can’t help but crack jokes constantly, it makes girls feel like you aren’t taking the relationship seriously, and things are only going to go downhill from there.

3. Stuck in the past.

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This is a tough one to pinpoint, because girls do appreciate being aware of the mistakes you made in the past. However, we don’t like to hear about your ex girlfriend any time her name pops into your head.

There is such a thing as giving away too much unneeded information, so make sure you censor yourself before you speak up. Your girlfriend needs to feel like she’s the most important person in your life, not your ex.

4. Looking too far into the future.

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Girls love to plan their future. Girls don’t like to plan their futures with a guy they just started dating.

Bringing up general plans, such as wanting to live in the city or work a bartending job part-time is acceptable, but attempting to name babies you haven’t had yet or suggesting a proposal is in the works too quickly will make a girl run for the hills faster than you can drop to one knee.

Make sure you are reading your relationship correctly before you jump to conclusions, because this could just be the end of it.

5. Jealousy.

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I don’t think girls hate anything more than having to constantly check in with a jealous boyfriend. As a girls’ boyfriend, you should trust her without a reason of a doubt, and if you don’t, you shouldn’t be in the relationship.

While sometimes it can make a girl feel good with a little jealousy here or there, when jealousy overtakes the relationship, problems are bound to ensue.

Trust her above all else and sidestep this problem from the beginning; otherwise it’s going to be a long and miserable road for the two of you.

6. Smothering.

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Girls love to feel needed, but there is a fine line between making a girl feel needed and suffocating her. We don’t like to be smothered. So please, please stop doing this.

By all means, buy us things, take us out as often as you can, show us off, make us feel pretty. But please stop breathing down our necks. Guys and girls should have an identity outside of the relationship, and when you no longer know who you are without her, it may be time to back off and give her some breathing room.

7. Too far removed.

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Of course, there is also the other extreme. Don’t smother us, but don’t completely disappear as if you're bored by us either. Like I said, girls love to feel needed.

When you are almost never around and are constantly picking your friends over her, she doesn’t feel needed anymore and will start to become self-conscious and removed from the relationship.

So unless this is the message you are trying to send, make sure you are still making her feel important and relevant; otherwise you’re going to lose her.

8. Controlling.

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Girls like a guy in control. Girls don’t like a guy that’s controlling. We appreciate a guy that will take the time out of his day to plan a nice date, that has a job and works towards something, that understands what it takes to be in a relationship.

We hate guys that tell us what we can and can’t do, that tell us whom we can and can’t hang out with and that try to control every aspect of our lives.

This line is different in every relationship, but be cautious of it, because a controlling boyfriend will find himself kicked to the curb sooner rather than later.

9. Not listening to her needs.

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While girls shouldn’t be described as needy, we definitely have needs. As a guy, you should be listening to these needs and making sure you are satisfying them.

Don’t just assume your girlfriend is happy, go out of your way to make sure that she is. We don’t ask you to be mind readers, just to give a little extra effort here and there to let us know you hear us and respect what we need.

I promise this extra effort will go a long way.

10. Lying.

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This is probably the most important of all the mistakes guys make in relationships. Trust is number one in all relationships, and breaking that doesn’t bode well for you. So do not lie, under any circumstances.

If a girl asks a question, she either already knows the answer or has every intention of finding it out, so lying will only dig you a deeper hole. Own up to whatever it is and go from there, because the truth has a way of revealing itself if you don’t.

Plus, no girl wants to be in a relationship with a liar.