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17 Reasons White People Riot

Pumpkins, disco, surfing. No, really.

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Fans riot after the Vancouver Canucks lost in Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Finals, 2011.
Bruce Bennett / Getty Images

Fans riot after the Vancouver Canucks lost in Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Finals, 2011.

1. Their sports team wins.

2. Their sports team loses.

3. Their sports coach leaves to coach another team.

4. They were asked not to party.

5. Black Friday.

6. Pumpkins.

7. Straw hats.

8. No more beer.

9. No more Cabbage Patch Dolls.

People riot at a pumpkin festival in Keene, New Hampshire, 2014.
AP Photo/The Boston Globe, Jeremy Fox

People riot at a pumpkin festival in Keene, New Hampshire, 2014.

10. Woodstock '99.

11. Spring break wasn't fun enough.

12. They don't like disco anymore.

13. St. Patrick's Day.

14. A guy is fired for covering up child molestation.

15. Surfing.

16. Desegregation.

17. The prospering of another race.

Penn State students riot after Joe Paterno was fired for helping to cover up Jerry Sandusky's child molestation scandal, 2011.
Nabil K. Mark/Centre Daily Times / MCT

Penn State students riot after Joe Paterno was fired for helping to cover up Jerry Sandusky's child molestation scandal, 2011.

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