1. You get dressed twice as fast as everyone else in the morning.
2. Washing your clothes is literally the easiest thing in the world.
3. As is shopping, because you know that each new black garment that you buy will perfectly match everything else in your wardrobe.
4. Which is why you never have to worry about your outfits not matching.
5. And you never have to fear that you'll look fat simply because you NEVER wear stripes.
6. You always look fierce.
7. And you instill fear and respect in all those who cross your path.
8. Particularly if those people try to tell you that your outfit "needs a touch of color."
9. When you actually do wear colors, you create a buzz.
10. If you are a man, you would never be caught dead wearing this type of disgusting light brown shoe:
11. Likewise, if you are a woman, you would never be seen in such a crime as this:
12. The sun seems to be attracted to you, causing a gentle warmth to radiate from your being, whilst everyone else is busy freezing their asses off.
13. Generally speaking, you look more intelligent.
14. You never make any fashion faux pas.
15. Your commitment to your stylistic choices is a testament to the fact that you know yourself very well.
16. In a world full of chaos, your wardrobe is the very image of order and unity.
17. In short, your wardrobe is awesome and so are you.
This post was translated from French.