Scientists Find Evidence That Men Are Idiots
Finally, hard evidence to back up what we've always suspected.
A new study published in the Christmas edition of the prestigious British Medical Journal suggests that men are idiots who do stupid things.
The researchers, from the northeast of England, studied verified winners of the Darwin Awards – which is given to people who managed to die in particularly stupid ways – to see if there was a difference in the number of men and women who got themselves killed by being idiots.
It's already been scientifically established that men are more likely to take part in risky activities, and to be admitted to hospital as a result of accidents, but this study is the first to examine the specific category of "idiotic risk taking behavour".
The researchers found that of 318 verified individual Darwin Award winners since 1995, 282 were men and just 36 were women.
The researchers wrote that this highly statistically significant finding "is entirely consistent with male idiot theory (MIT) and supports the hypothesis that men are idiots and idiots do stupid things".
However, they acknowledge that the study has some flaws. It may be that men are more likely to be nominated or chosen for a Darwin Award for other reasons, or that stories of idiotic men are simply considered more newsworthy by the media. Misandry.
The authors say that further research into male idiocy is needed, and suggest that Christmas parties may be a useful research venue for examining the effects of alcohol consumption on idiotic behaviour across the sexes.
It's worth remembering that the BMJ's Christmas issue is well-known for featuring a rather eccentric selection of articles. While the studies are all peer-reviewed, just like other papers, the topics are...somewhat unusual.
Other articles in the 2014 Christmas edition include a study of whether magazines in doctors' waiting rooms are always really old, and another examining whether left-wing people sit down more than centrist or right-wing people. Previous years have examined how much James Bond actually drank and how magic is inherited in the Harry Potter books.