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1. You singlehandedly double, maybe triple, Kleenex sales.
2. You forgot what your eyes normally look like.
3. You run out of excuses for people wondering why your eyes look like a before-double-eyelid-plastic-surgery ad every morning.
4. You become your own worst enemy. Case in point, your right hand reaches for the phone and your left hand restrains your right.
5. If you don't live alone, long drives in your car become your sanctuary.
6. You wonder what other motorists must think of you singing-slash-sobbing to every sappy love song at the top of your lungs.
7. You're positive every movie, song, book is talking about you. It's all one big conspiracy.
8. Every cliche you've ever heard suddenly seems like golden nuggets of wisdom.
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