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1. NEVER, EVER, EVER take someone’s eggs or flatbread from the make-your-own station, or you will feel the wrath of the victim. Wait in the line and get your own.
2. Hillside lot is a free-for-all. Don’t expect people to park inside the lines, because 9 times out of 10, they won’t and don’t.
3. The Spa closes at 1 AM, even on weekends. If you want your weekly/daily/twice daily BBQ-chick dilla, make sure you get there before 12:45 AM because that’s when they close the grill.
4. Keep a senior close on the weekends to get into the Apartments, because they’re the only ones who can let you in. But, if you do get into the Apts, know where you’re going. Don’t just roam around aimlessly.
5. Befriend your professors. It will help you in more ways than you know right now.
6. On that note, participate in the Take Your Professor to Lunch/Coffee programs. Your professor gets free lunch from the dining hall, and if you take them to coffee, you both get free coffee/tea. They're cooler than you think!
7. Put your Colby Card in your wallet and your keys on a key chain. Lanyards are for summer camp, not college.
8. Don’t try to cheat the system during room draw. Kim Kenniston will end you. Also, be honest with your friends. Nothing since Monopoly has destroyed more friendships (and relationships) than room draw.
9. The third floor of Miller is the scariest place on Earth. Enter if you dare, but be prepared to get death looks if you breathe, cough, blink, or turn a page.
10. Learn Papa John’s number by heart and/or immediately program it into your phone. You won’t regret it. Especially when it’s Saturday at 2:30 AM and the Spa’s closed.
11. Do the same for WHOP. Steakbombs save lives on Saturday nights.
12. The four science buildings (Mudd, Keyes, Arey, Olin) can be known as "Mary Kate Ashley Olsen." It will save you from the embarrassment of showing up ten minutes late on your first day of classes.
13. If you get put in Hillside, embrace it. Don’t complain. It may not be the prettiest dorm, but it’s basically a second COOT. Lifetime bonds, people.
14. Embrace the free spa bagel part of the board plan once a week, but make sure you get in line before everyone else (or have nowhere else to be) because otherwise the line will be out the door and you’ll be late for class.
15. The games right outside the pub (pool, foosball, etc.) aren’t 21+, even on Pub Nights! Use them to relieve stress during finals or as a way to hang out with friends.
16. Check the dining hall menus, especially on Mondays. There’s nothing worse for a carnivore than swiping into Dana on a Meatless Monday.
17. Speaking of dining halls, the card swipe ladies are your BEST FRIENDS. Love them, give them presents, be as nice as you possibly can to them. It will pay off.
18. Read (and work for) Colby's weekly student-newspaper, The Colby Echo. Since 1877, the Echo has served as the College's most reliable news source. We also have the coolest club office on campus.
19. Most importantly—have fun! Meet as many people as possible. Sign up for waaay too many clubs. Take a class you know nothing about. Do as many new things as you can. You have no idea how short four years are.
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