1. Hercules = The New, “Improved” Superman
Wavy slicked-back hair? CHECK! Huge muscles? CHECK! Gift that their spirit father gave them prominently displayed? CHECK! Blue eyes? CHECK! Cape? CHECK! Perfect teeth? CHECK!
2. We begin our story in a supernatural world.
3. A child has just been born to a high-ranking government official and a lady.
Both women just happen to have long flowing hair and similar gowns. It’s pretty normal for people to dress like that in movies set centuries apart and on different planets.
4. The new family’s happiness is forever jeopardized because a bad guy thinks he should rule.
5. Because of this, the child is sent to a new planet: Earth.
6. The adoptive parents find the kid in the wilderness with a meaningful device from his original planet.
7. The adoptive parents are both farmers.
8. As he grows up, the kid has no idea why he is different.
It never occurs to them that having super-human strength might make them not human…
9. Their adoptive dads tell them not to let anyone know about their powers.
10. Since they can’t show off their super cool powers, they’re unpopular.
11. When they’re old enough, the boy’s adoptive parents finally show him an artifact from “his world.”
Yes, they’re both made out of metal. What’s your point? One is a medal. The other is a weird control pin thing that no one really understands.
OK, so they both have the family crest.
12. Young Hercules/Superman then go off in search of who they really are.
Both travel over the sea and mountains…
13. They then find a “temple” for their respective worlds.
14. These temples are both conveniently found on mountains.
15. At the temple, the spirit of their fathers speaks to them and tells them that they must become a hero.
16. Then their spirit-dads give them a gift to go about becoming a hero…
17. Look, now they can both fly!
19. Right about now, the same evil guy from before comes back and tries to kill Herc/Superman because he wants to be the leader of their kind.
20. Speaking of the evil guys, they both have fire power (eventually).
21. They also fly similar aircrafts.
22. They also both have devoted minions…
23. Also, the evil guy really really hates Superman’s/Hercules’ biological father.
24. The evil guy sends “monsters” and his minions to finish off Superman/Herc.
25. It is then up to Herc/Superman to save the human race, since humans are helpless.
26. Meanwhile, Megara/Lois Lane also need continued saving from them.
27. Meg = Lois Lane
Both try to be headstrong, independent women, but are impulsive and get themselves into bad situations.
They also both have a thing for strong men despite not wanting to be saved…
28. During these rescue attempts and fights, Hercules/ Superman are unfazed by the fact that entire cities are destroyed because of them.
29. When the bad guy hasn’t defeated Hercules/ Superman yet, he uses his last and final weapon.
Both of which involve a beam of light pointed at the ground…
31. Herc and Superman must then go into the bad guys’ “lair” and go against their old world.
Hercules rescues Meg from the Underworld even though he risks his life to do so.
Superman must destroy the nesting chamber, which is way that his kind would live again.
32. The bad guys then freak out when they realize they have lost. So there’s a final showdown and they are killed.
33. Then since they did so much awesome stuff, Herc/ Superman get the girl!
34. Herc and Superman are reunited with their parents/ adoptive parents.
35. Then despite becoming “gods,” Hercules and Superman both decide to stay human.
Hercules lives happily ever after with the girl.
Clark Kent becomes a reporter at his girlfriend’s paper.
- The 36 victims in the Oakland warehouse fire were trapped with "no way out" in America's deadliest blaze in over a decade.
- President-elect Donald Trump has picked former WWE CEO Linda McMahon to lead the Small Business Administration.
- Tennessee authorities have charged two minors with starting the massive wildfires that killed 14 people last month.
- This dad had the most adorable freak out to his family when he met his first alpaca 😂