Why People Driving Cars Are Actually Just Big Toddlers
1. We get irrationally mad over the smallest things.
NO BLINKER???? WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO RUIN MY LIFE?
2. And yet a simple "I'm sorry" hand gesture will often calm us right back down.
We'll be damned if we let anyone just cut us off, but if they just give a simple
(yet apologetic) "can I cut in?" look, we almost instantly forgive them.
3. Social norms don't apply in a car, and most times we'll just yell whatever it is that we're thinking at the moment.
GET OFF THE ROAD YOU IDIOT!!!
HAVE YOU EVER DRIVEN A CAR BEFORE, GRANDMA?
4. Because we like to point at people and just yell "NO!"
"NO!" you can't sneak in here.
"NO!" don't you dare pull out.
"NO!" just no.
5. Because people do gross things in their car they wouldn't normally do in any other public setting. Like pick their boogers.
I feel like some people think they're invisible in their car and just do whatever they damn well please. Like drive without pants.
I understand taking off your shoes to get a little more comfortable, but pants? Really? Invest in some sweat pants at least.
Not sure what is worse here, the fuzzy steering wheel cover or the fact this kid is obviously hammered.
6. There is no such thing as patience in a car.
Sitting for one minute in traffic is one minute too long.
We've got better things to do than just sit in our car! Like sit on the couch usually...
7. Because dropping our favorite toy will make us absolutely lose our shit.
I'm talking about that awful moment when your phone falls into the deep dark crevice between your seat and the middle console.
"NOOOOOOOO! IT'S GONE FOREVER!!!"
8. Because we are about as demanding as it gets while behind the wheel.
Have you ever tried to give someone directions when they are driving and lost?
It's seriously like talking to a toddler.
Because the fact they're lost is obviously you're fault, never mind you're just trying to help.
9. Making any decision while in a car becomes a difficult one.
"Should I get gas here?"
"Do I need to put air in my tires?"
"Should I pull off here?"
"Is this my exit?"
"Do I need to fix that check engine light?"
"Should we get food here?"
"Is it too hot in here?"
10. Lastly, I think we are most like toddlers behind the wheel because usually the reason for 99% of our angst is rooted in the fact we are either
a. tired or b. hungry.
And usually just a little bag of Cheerios is all it takes to boost our mood.
Taylor blogs at www.thedailytay.com
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