I think it's safe to say we've all had an embarrassing injury or two in our lifetimes. Most of the time the physical pain only lasts for a minute, but it's your pride that really takes a hit.
Well, this week Reddit user jcrewz took embarrassing injuries to a whole new level and asked, "What's an injury you sustained and lied about how it actually happened because it was too embarrassing?" and WHEW, did people deliver!
Here are just a few of the cringeworthy responses:
1. "I was once buttering toast with my face really close to the kitchen counter because I like it to be precisely buttered. I sneezed and slammed my head on the counter and effectively knocked myself out. I had to go to the emergency room to be treated for a concussion."
2. "One time I was removing facial hair using a remover cream. I ended up leaving it on for too long, which caused burns."
3. "I once fell out of bed and cracked my head open on the metal bed frame. I had to go to the emergency room and get stitches. The truth is, I didn't want to go to bed, so I flung myself out of bed to pretend to get hurt. I just wanted to stay up for a little bit longer.
4. "I have these really ugly shoes I wear around the house that my husband absolutely hates. I was taking laundry down the stairs, and I fell down because of the shoes. I couldn't tell him they were the reason, so I said the dog ran between my legs and made me fall."
5. "I got a black eye as a kid because I slipped and fell onto the support beam of the basketball rim. My dad made me lie to my other family members and say I got it defending some kids at school. He was pretty embarrassed by how terrible I was at basketball."
6. "I threw out my back when I sneezed really hard, but I told people I hurt it when I moved something heavy."
7. "I got surgery on my knees a few years ago because I had dislodged some loose cartilage in the joint and torn a bit of my meniscus. At the time, I was playing a ton of ultimate frisbee, so I just told people that's what caused it. In reality, it happened when I was getting up from a chair."
8. "One time I was getting hot and heavy with my boyfriend. He reached under my shirt and unhooked my bra and then pulled my shirt and bra up over my head. As he did this, the underwire in my cheap-ass bra popped out and left a huge scratch right across my forehead. I made up some story about digging through my closet and getting scratched by a hanger."
9. "I once managed to get a drop of concentrated sulphuric acid on my nose in chemistry class. It was the most physically painful experience of my entire life. I just sat in the back of the classroom wiping tears out my eyes silently because I was too awkward to say anything. In my next class, people asked me what happened to me, and I had an awkward time explaining how you get sulphuric acid on your nose. I just itched my nose like an idiot."
10. "In third grade, I held a pencil in my fist, point up. I sneezed and face planted into it. I’m 24 now, and every once in a while someone tells me that I have blue ink on my forehead. I then have to tell them that it’s actually a scar from stabbing myself in the face mid-sneeze."
11. I was in high school taking my morning shower. It was an older house and the shower was a tiled-in room with a glass door. Being the high school dork that I was, I thought it would be cool if I ninja-elbowed the door open. The whole door spider-webbed and one little piece popped out, leaving me with a nice gash on my elbow."
12. "I told people my fingernail fell off while I was playing football. However, it was really just from an intense game of sword-fighting on Wii Sport Resort when I slammed my hand really hard on a table."
13. "I have a scar that crosses my left eyebrow. It looks badass, and I got it during a fight against a man with a knife. At least that's what I tell everybody because saying my PlayStation 2 fell on my face when I tried to lift it sounds really stupid.
14. "I once punched a bowling ball because I was frustrated. It turns out bowling balls are pretty hard. I ended up breaking my hand."
15. "I drunkenly jumped off a 12 foot recreational climbing wall to impress a boy and broke both of my legs. It put me in a wheelchair for the rest of the summer. I just say I had a rock climbing accident."
16. "I caught my ex with his hand sliced open. He told me he was handling knives, which turned out to be partially true. He left out the part about his hand slipping on the knife while he was trying to sneak a chunk of cookie dough I had put in the freezer."
17. "I say I slipped in my heels on ice leaving my apartment in New York, but really I slipped while dancing into my kitchen in those heels. I now have permanent nerve damage in my left foot."
18. "I once semi-dislocated my kneecap while sitting down to eat at the dinner table and twisting my leg. I hurt myself sitting down. Instead, I told my friends I had fallen down a steep hill on the local heathland, but my brother told them the truth, and I was promptly mocked."
19. "I broke my toe running from a bee. I hate bugs that sting, so when a bee got in my hair, I freaked out. I ran toward the house, lost my balance, kicked the concrete step of my mom's porch, and fell backwards."
20. "I lied to my family when I said my co-worker accidentally shot me in the hand with a nail gun because, in fact, I accidentally shot myself in the hand with a nail gun."
21. "I ate a slice of cheese pizza while it was too hot. The cheese stuck to my chin and blistered before I could get it off. I told everyone it was a zit I’d popped so they didn’t think I was some sort of pizza-inhaling goblin."
Stories have been edited for length and/or clarity. H/T Reddit.