Buzz·Posted on 13 Feb 201522 Secrets Musical Theatre Actors Will Never Tell YouNo, I can't go for a drink. I've got a temp job to get to in the morning.by Natalie BlenfordBuzzFeed ContributorFacebookPinterestTwitterMailLink 1. We never know what day of the week it is. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF northbrookpl.tumblr.com We just know if it's a one-show day, a two-show day, an audition day, or a long-awaited day off. 2. In between scenes, we’re not going over lines or practising dance moves. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Gossip Girl / redqueenscreamsforicecream.tumblr.com / Via giphy.com We're just eating Haribo, putting more make-up on, and playing Candy Crush. 3. That hot leading man you’re swooning over? Probably gay. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Via giphy.com And if he is straight, he's almost certainly in a love hexagon with half of the ensemble. Yet still, we wait. 4. Backstage can be a cold, lonely place... Flickr: queensucanada 5. ...but we're experts at turning Soviet-style dressing rooms into the cosiest corners EVER. Sarah McNicholas / BuzzFeed Opening night flowers and good luck cards always help. 6. Everyone we work with has seen us quick-changing in our underwear. The Commitments / Via Twitter: @thecommitments And that's before we even mention posing for the West End Bares charity calendar. 7. We get really bad post-show blues. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF ericazach.tumblr.com Even one day away from the bright lights of the theatre can leave us feeling kind of ill. 8. We’re ever hopeful that every missed call is someone trying to offer us a job. Channel 4 / Via unitedagents.co.uk It rarely is. 9. We dream of the day we're important enough to have two small plastic microphones coming out of our forehead. Gina Beck / Via Twitter: @Gina_Beck Once we've got a double mic pack, we know we've made it. 10. That little black-and-white photo in the programme is way more than a casual selfie. englishrosefrommanchester.com Actually, it's the result of a three-month scientific analysis of our casting bracket, 48 hours shopping for tops, two hours posing in a cold studio, and one week sifting through 352 thumbnail options. 11. Sometimes we go to the gym and just sit in the steam room for an hour. Flickr: mattimattila The steam helps stop our voices from drying out. But we'll probably still tweet to say we've had the best workout ever. 12. If our backstage track is disrupted, we freak out. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF princess-briar-rose-x.tumblr.com If we don’t pass the exact same person at the exact same time in the exact same place every time we do the show, our control freak sensibilities will kick in and we’ll think something bad is going to happen. 13. Everyone looks like they love one another on stage, but behind the scenes it's a different story. NBC / Via neontommy.com I mean, sometimes we really do. But that's not a guarantee. 14. Whenever we do our tax returns, we realise we make more money from teaching and temping than acting. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Paramount Pictures / Via hijacked.com.au But don't ask us if this means we're giving up. It doesn't. 15. When you are surreptitiously texting in a dark theatre, we can see you. broadwaybaby.com / Via broadwaybaby.com And we hate you. 16. We've been known to say our lines really fast to shave 13 vital minutes off a show. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Via giphy.com If a cast, band, or crew member has a hot date and needs to get out a few minutes early, we'll do our best to get them there. 17. Thursday is the best night to see a musical. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Via giphy.com Saturday night tickets are always most in demand, but by the time we've done eight shows, we're knackered. We have much more energy on a Thursday. 18. We do roughly nine auditions over three months to get one job. Michael Harlan / Via achoruslinelondon.com And the waiting game is the hardest part. 19. We dream of being thrown on for the lead at a moment's notice. 42nd Street Of course we pretend to be perfectly happy with our current role. And we don't want anyone to hurt themselves. But if they do, we want to save the day even if we've had no rehearsal. Because that's showbiz. 20. We're definitely not vain, but we never ever tire of talking about The Business. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Via sharegif.com And ourselves. And how we're doing within The Business. 21. But sometimes we take a costume selfie and wonder, What am I doing with my life? Amy Bird / BuzzFeed / Via Twitter: @DiscoBirdy Especially if we're not playing a human. 22. But every time the phone rings with a job offer, the feelings of elation flood back. Johan Persson / Via legallyblondethemusical.co.uk We're so happy we could burst! All our insecurities melt away and we can't wait to hit Twitter to start bragging about rehearsals. #Blessed.