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21 Signs You're Secretly A Real Bitch

You judge everything.

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2. Your phone's camera roll is full of screengrabs of slightly cringe things your friends have done on social media that you've sent to someone else.

Whenever you see something embarrassing, you have to share it immediately.

3. And whenever your school friends announce their engagements on Facebook, you send a screengrab to your mum to assess whether their ring is tacky or not.

4. If someone says something mean to you at work, you have a designated bitching buddy who'll meet you in the loo for a power-moan.

DreamWorks Pictures

"I'd rather have my face and a lower salary than their face and all the money in the world."

5. You play "What would you change?" all the time.

Universal Pictures

"If I was Amy, I'd start with cutting my hair, then I'd probably buy a whole new wardrobe, and then I'd get a new personality."

7. You often find yourself saying "Oh I love your hair", when you actually mean, "Your hair looks different."

Paramount Pictures

You feel like you have to acknowledge the change, even if you're not into it.

8. There are some random things that you know you shouldn't judge, but you do. And you can't help it.

You might think that wearing odd socks to work says something about a person, for example.

9. And you always find yourself classifying new people you meet as "that kind of person".

Warner Bros.

"His room was too hot, and he refused to open the window. He's that kind of person."

12. You know that some of your opinions would hurt people's feelings, so you only voice them to a very select group of people.

15. If a friend tells you a secret and says, "Never tell anyone," you assume that excludes your BFF, your S.O., your siblings, and your mum.

17. You know that if the people around you could hear your internal monologue, you wouldn't have any friends.

But it's OK because it doesn't count if you only think it.

20. And if anyone is ever mean to you, you just think, "Oh it must be because they have a sad and lonely life and they are jealous of my happy and fulfilled life."

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