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21 Signs You're Secretly A Real Bitch

You judge everything.

1. Even though you pride yourself on not being judgmental, you know you are.

2. Your phone's camera roll is full of screengrabs of slightly cringe things your friends have done on social media that you've sent to someone else.

3. And whenever your school friends announce their engagements on Facebook, you send a screengrab to your mum to assess whether their ring is tacky or not.

4. If someone says something mean to you at work, you have a designated bitching buddy who'll meet you in the loo for a power-moan.

5. You play "What would you change?" all the time.

6. And you and your friends have ranked everyone you know out of 10 multiple times.

7. You often find yourself saying "Oh I love your hair", when you actually mean, "Your hair looks different."

8. There are some random things that you know you shouldn't judge, but you do. And you can't help it.

9. And you always find yourself classifying new people you meet as "that kind of person".

10. You randomly impose your own standards on other people.

11. And you always pass judgment on how clean other people's houses are.

12. You know that some of your opinions would hurt people's feelings, so you only voice them to a very select group of people.

13. But chances are, your siblings share the same opinions.

14. As soon as you see a new person, you instantly assess their outfit.

15. If a friend tells you a secret and says, "Never tell anyone," you assume that excludes your BFF, your S.O., your siblings, and your mum.

16. Sometimes you look at people and just think, "how"?

17. You know that if the people around you could hear your internal monologue, you wouldn't have any friends.

18. Sometimes, when you can tell someone wants to get into your conversation but you don't want them to, you just ignore them.

19. And whenever anyone offers you ~constructive~ criticism, you're like "purrrrlease, you don't even know".

20. And if anyone is ever mean to you, you just think, "Oh it must be because they have a sad and lonely life and they are jealous of my happy and fulfilled life."

21. But hey, there's nothing wrong with being a bitch.