TV and MoviesΒ·Posted on Jul 4, 201721 Funny Tweets About Disney That Also Point Out Some Fucked-Up Shit"Goofy should have a dead wife."by Stephen LaConteBuzzFeed StaffLinkFacebookPinterestTwitterMail 1. Dana Schwartz @DanaSchwartzzz BELLE: There goes the baker with his tray like always BAKER: well there goes Belle, singing her DAILY MEAN SONG about us 01:26 AM - 16 Jun 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 2. Goddamnit Jamie @Jay_FrickinLynn *slams hands on table* HOW DID BUZZ KNOW TO FREEZE AROUND HUMANS IF HE DIDN'T KNOW HE WAS A TOY, CAROL? 06:58 PM - 02 Jul 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 3. Carrie Wittmerπ @carriesnotscary "Be Our Guest" is a great song but at the same time it's a man candle telling a woman what a restaurant is 02:39 PM - 16 Mar 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 4. Sophia Benoit @1followernodad I can't even tell you how mad I would be as sleeping beauty if some dude just came in & woke me up & then was like let's get married. 05:36 PM - 12 Jan 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 5. Jesse McLaren @McJesse If I were Princess Belle I'd never get past the talking furniture. 4 days in I'd still be screaming. 05:15 PM - 29 Jul 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 6. Kibblesmith βοΈ @kibblesmith A 90s Disney exec reclines with his feet on the conference table. He takes a few puffs from his cigar. "Goofy should have a dead wife." 06:03 PM - 25 Feb 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 7. Swedish Canary @SwedishCanary That prince in Sleeping Beauty really doesnβt get enough credit for kissing someone who hadnβt brushed her teeth in 100 years. 02:34 AM - 16 Jun 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 8. Sady Doyle @sadydoyle We really never talked enough about the fact that Ariel's main hobby was "looting corpses for whatever they had in their pockets." 06:40 PM - 18 Mar 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 9. Megan Amram @meganamram Belle was the first hot girl to pretend she was a nerd in high school 04:18 PM - 30 Jun 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 10. Conor Ohworst @Mactasia Sebastian the Crab had the right idea singing constantly cause if I was Ariel I'd eat his delicious flesh the second the showtunes stopped. 06:59 PM - 09 Jun 2011 Reply Retweet Favorite 11. Matt Roller @rolldiggity "You're still a winner," Pinocchio whispered into his third drink. He wept as his nose grew to touch the glass. 03:23 AM - 22 Aug 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 12. k e e t π€π₯ @KeetPotato me: "why was she called the little mermaid, she was 5ft7?" therapist: "i meant anything bothering you about your marriage keith" 07:39 PM - 27 Feb 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 13. francistogram @francistogram [pitch meeting] Okay so it's a ton of dogs. Dalmatians. 100 of 'em. I call it "100 Dalmatians." [idea man pipes in] Let's think bigger 10:30 PM - 08 Dec 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 14. dream ghoul @TheDreamGhoul My favorite Disney song is the one where the baby lion can't wait for his dad to die so he can be King 01:43 AM - 08 Apr 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 15. Brock Baker @BrockBaker My favorite character in Beauty and the Beast is this dresser waiting to fuck up a villager with a baseball bat. 12:43 AM - 27 Mar 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 16. Melanie Bracewell @meladoodle The most amazing thing about Finding Dory is how they managed to put a receding hairline on a fish 01:42 AM - 14 Jun 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 17. Jeremy Radin @germyradin BEAST: STAY OUT OF THE WEST WING BELLE: why BEAST: JUST STAY OUT [later, Belle enters West Wing] ROB LOWE: hi BELLE : πππ BEAST: SON OF A 08:02 PM - 12 Feb 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 18. Dana Schwartz @DanaSchwartzzz Maybe Aladdin would be able to get a real job if he wore a shirt and not just a tiny vest 01:44 AM - 05 Mar 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 19. Mara Wilson @MaraWilson Belle could have easily set up some kind of literacy program in her town instead of being a pretentious snit about it 06:42 PM - 28 Jun 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 20. Sarah @thetigersez Total bs that when Sleeping Beauty spends all day in bed she's a "beautiful princess," but when I do the same I'm "clinically depressed." 01:15 AM - 31 Oct 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 21. Kibblesmith βοΈ @kibblesmith Do we all agree there is a 100% chance an earlier version of this machine killed Belle's mom 11:07 PM - 02 Jul 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite