51 Thoughts All Single People Have At New Year's Eve Parties
Can't wait to kiss no one!
1. All right, let's scope out the potential kissers.
2. Hmm, that guy's cute.
3. Wait, who's that coming towards him?
4. Oh. Must be his girlfriend. Dammit.
5. Maybe they're just friends.
6. Yeah, no. Not just friends. Friends don't kiss like that. At least, my friends don't...
7. Okay, onto option number two...
8. Hellllloooooo, gorgeous!
9. I bet he's a good kisser.
10. Should I go talk to him?
11. Oh, God, he's looking this way.
12. ABORT, ABORT!
13. I'll just pull out my phone and pretend I'm talking to someone.
14. Yeah, that'll look natural.
15. He's gotta fall for it and move along now.
16. Nothing to see here, sir.
17. He's coming this way.
18. This is not a drill.
19. I repeat, THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
20. Stop it. I do this every year.
21. Just try and talk to someone.
22. He's almost here. I'll flash a cute smile.
23. Hope there's nothing in my teeth.
24. With my luck, there is.
25. Wait, why is he walking passed me?
26. Annnddd he's gone.
27. He's meeting up with a group of people I'm not a part of. Great.
29. All right, minor setback.
30. Why's everyone cheering?
31. And counting?
32. Oh, the ball's about to drop.
33. Hey, couple making out in the corner, WE CAN SEE YOU.
34. Can't you wait 10 more seconds?!
35. OK, so that ball is moving way too slowly. Can we hurry this up?
36. Look at all the couples, huddling together, getting ready for smoochin'.
37. Must be nice!
38. I told myself this wasn't gonna happen again.
39. WHY WON'T SOMEONE LOVE ME?
40. I'm cute, funny, smart, sort of successful. What's not to like?
40. At least this champagne is good.
41. Like, really good.
42. Holy crap, it's amazing.
43. I should just date this.
45. Wait, no, I can't do that.
46. OK, the ball finally fell.
47. Look at all the couples kissing.
48. You know, this isn't so bad.
49. I'm by myself, so what? I'll eventually find someone.
50. Right now, I'm just content with myself and my champagne.
51. Especially the champagne.