A site dedicated to "assessing the space-readiness of some notable human beings", Thespaceshipneedsacaptain.com has to have one of the most deliberately awkward URLs in history -- but everything you need to know is in the title.
At first the idea seems deranged, but dig a little deeper and you find things like this, re: Kate "Middleton: "Our panel is intrigued by a woman who brings all the benefits of royalty -- and none of the genetics."
Nuff said.
There's some perfect one-liners: "Poised at the peak of the fashion industry for half a century, Karl Lagerfeld has proven his ability to survive in a hostile void."
The marriage prospects of Kanye West are summarised thusly: "West currently enjoys a balance of family life and stellar career, but it can't last. Precedents suggest he could escape a crippling divorce settlement by moving off-world while packaging his abandonment of the Kardashian complex as a heroic sacrifice."
And this definition of fame from the FAQ encapsulates the nature of modern celebrity in a nushell: "The critical question is whether a selfie taken with this person would amaze your friends. If the answer is yes, this person is a celebrity."
So Vladimir Putin makes the list.
It's hard to explain unless you've been to the site itself, but there's some fairly deep-end satire happening here. It feels absurd, but also somehow honest. My personal favourite is, maybe, this quote re: Suri Cruise: "Given the inevitably tragic trajectory of her life on earth, it's probably best to get off planet now."
Utterly bizarre, but undeniably true.