1. You're not going to stonewall us on this cookie thing, Senator McConnell
2. No, there were NOT two cookies left in the Winnie the Pooh cookie jar
3. That's right. ONE cookie. Just one.
4. It doesn't matter how big the cookie was, Sir. It was the last cookie
5. Don't talk to us about Crumble-Down Economics, Mitch. That's not a thing
6. Are you smiling right now? This is FUNNY TO YOU?!
7. Oh, holy shit. STOP LAUGHING!!
8. . . .
9. "You didn't bake that."
10. That's right. Now think about what you've done
11. "I'm sorry I ate the cookie."
This post was created by a member of BuzzFeed Community, where anyone can post awesome lists and creations. Learn more or post your buzz!