Happy To Hangry: A Step-By-Step Guide

Han-gry (han-gree) adjective, 1) A state of anger caused by lack of food 2) Hunger resulting in a negative shift in your mood 3) Frustration as a result of prolonged starvation

1. 7:30 AM

You wake up in the morning after 8 hours of sleep, feeling like a million bucks.

2. 8:00 AM

Fridge empty? No problem, I want to carry this positive momentum into the office and cooking breakfast would just slow me down. I’ll go to Trader Joe’s after work!

3. 8:10 AM

Hey little fella!

4. 8:15 AM

Nabbed a seat on the express train right as I got on the platform, and there isn’t even an old woman around to guilt me into giving it up to her.

Sweet.

5. 8:40 AM

Maybe i’ll get a bacon, egg and cheese with an iced coffee from the deli?

Nah, that line is too long, I’d rather just get to work a few minutes early.

6. 8:43 AM

Another B-E-A-utiful New York City morning. Hello office!

7. 8:48 AM

Only 25 unread emails in my inbox? This is going to be a great day!

8. 10:00 AM

Oh wow, what is that wonderful aroma filling the air? That smell is unmistakable.

9. 10:01 AM

Goddamn Steve from Sales has a bacon, egg and cheese sandwich. Why would you even be eating, call your leads!

I never liked that guy.

10. 10:02 AM

Heeeeeey Steve, they need you over in Conference Room 1, are you going to finish that sandwich?

11. 10:42 AM

That project you’ve been working on for the past 3 weeks? Yea, compliance needs to have a word with you…

12. 10:45 AM

Maybe the vending machine will hold me over until lunch.

13. 10:46 AM

Snickers, you are a chocolate covered liar.
250 calories of nougat, caramel and peanuts aren’t that satisfying.

14. 11:03 AM

My inbox is full? THAT THING DOESN’T EVEN HAVE A MOUTH, STOMACH, OR DIGESTIVE SYSTEM.

15. 11:20 AM

Team meeting? Really? Chipotle just opened and I was going to get a jump on the line by ordering online.

16. 11:50 AM

“So, why don’t we take a quick five minute water break and then meet back here for the back end of this regroup.”

17. 12:10 PM

“Based on this market research, I believe we can shift our messaging and strategy to acquire more leads at a lower cost.”

18. 12:25 PM

“Alright everyone, that just about wraps it up. Check your inbox for the meeting minutes later this afternoon.”

19. 12:29 PM

20. 12:33 PM

Feeding frenzy!

21. 12:40 PM

Hanger cured, happiness restored.

22. 1:00 PM

Food coma.

Author’s Note

Being hangry is a serious medical condition and should not be treated lightly. If you or a friend are feeling hangry, please eat something delicious immediately. Hesitance to alleviate symptoms of hanger can result in relentless snarkiness, lack of productivity, excessive swearing, decreased morale, below average conversion rates, aloofness and in extreme cases…violence.

DO NOT judge your friends for their actions or behavior while hangry, and if hanger persists, 3-5 strips of bacon should cure the problem.

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