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    10 Things Britney Spears Is Not

    Britney Spears is a lot of things. Here are some things she's not.

    SeanAbley
    by SeanAbley

    Community Contributor

    A Waffle Iron

    This waffle iron has a 5-setting browning control, a nonstick cook plate, and a two year warranty. Britney has none of these things.

    The Bataan Death March

    The Bataan Death March, a forced march by the Japanese during WW2, resulted in the deaths of anywhere between 2,500 and 10,000 POWs. Britney didn't do that.

    Mrs. Dash ™

    Britney is not married to Mr. Dash.

    An Academy Award ™ Winning Actress

    Yet.

    Kale

    Britney is not the latest difficult vegetable made upscale by hipster chefs.

    A Single Use Plastic Bag

    If she were, she'd be banned in Los Angeles County.

    Munchausen By Proxy Syndrome

    Britney is not a form of child abuse that involves purposefully making children sick to get attention from doctors and medical staff.

    Based On the Novel "Push" By Sapphire

    She's not.

    That Weird Way People Fold Shirts

    View this video on YouTube
    youtube.com

    Britney is not any laundry-related process.

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