Remember Prince Eric — tall, dark, and handsome owner of waterfront property? Well, I hate to break it to you, but he's officially CANCELLED.
And Ariel — red-headed fish woman with a case of laryngitis? Literally never heard of her in my life.
There's only one Disney couple in this world that matters, and that's Roger and Anita from 101 Dalmatians.
Let's start off with a basic, indisputable fact — they're both hot 👏 as 👏 heck 👏
Seriously, look at Roger straight up SERVING looks.
Anita knows a fine piece of ass when she sees one!
And let's not sleep on the fact their entire relationship was orchestrated by two DOGS. Your Tinder profile just deleted itself.
Still not convinced? Need more proof? Let's compare — SHALL WE?
Anita is an intellectual who reads leather-bound books in the park.
Ariel is a 16-year-old fish who signed a contract written by a literal sea witch without even reading through it.
Roger's a musician who writes his own music and plays MULTIPLE instruments.
Prince Eric only plays the flute and holds it like he's eating a fucking Go-Gurt.
Anita is well-dressed and expertly accessorized.
Ariel wears a sack and thinks it's fashun.
Roger looks like a blonde John Krasinski.
Eric looks like he'd tell you how surprisingly easy it is to open up to you emotionally, and then ghost on you after three dates!!!!*
Roger and Anita literally own OVER A HUNDRED DOGS.
Eric and Ariel own one dog (who may or may not have eyes) and a judgmental crab.
Bottom line? Roger and Anita are talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, showstopping, spectacular, never the same, totally unique, completely not ever been done before Disney characters who deserve some FUCKIN' RESPECT.
A classic Disney love, but realistic and relatable!!!
I rest my case — court dismissed!
