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1. A classy with a ~touch of sultry~ sequined mini with a mesh-accented neckline and figure-hugging skirt that'll definitely make you ~ooh~ and ~ahh~ when you look in the mirror. Consider your favorite LBD upgraded!
2. A darling Calvin Klein colorblock sheath that'll help you knock any speech or special occasion out of the banquet hall — you polished Polly, you!
3. An embroidered maxi dress for staying covered and cozy during chillier weather, while making you look like the boho princess you secretly are — one day they'll make a movie about your double-identity life, I'm sure.
4. A swingy Free People velvet mini with an eerie similarity to Guardians of the Galaxy's Groot — it's only capable of communicating one phrase: "I HAVE POCKETS!!!"
5. A darling lace floor-sweeping gown perfect for any occasion where, no matter how hard you try to stretch the dress code, those "joggers that could totally, kinda pass as dress pants" absolutely won't fly.
6. A silky Eloquii patterned maxi destined to make you stand apart from the rest of your colleagues — I'm not saying it's a competition, but if it was, you'd be ranked #1.
7. A floral tulle extravaganza if you feel like donning an entire enchanted garden on your body, which I hope is very often — just look at this beautiful embroidered overlay!!!
8. A side-slit little black sweater dress to feel dressed up even when you're pretty bundled up — it goes perfectly with tights and, unlike a regular LBD, it won't make your limbs feel like they've been frozen over like a winter pond!!
9. An off-the-shoulder Reformation dress for those "just came from frolicking amongst the sunflowers" vibes, no matter what time of the year it actually is.
10. A draped blouson bodice Adrianna Papell dreamboat that'll cascade down your body like peaceful waves of intricately-designed, beaded fabric — I mean, just look at this wedding photo! You best believe all eyes will be glued to you!
11. A curve-hugging bandage dress with a mermaid bottom, so everyone will associate you with the phrase ~va-va-voom~ from now until eternity. You're hot stuff!
12. A pretty v-neck lace fit and flare dress that'll be the perfect +1 to all the weddings you have on your cal — since when did they specify that your guest had to be human? This dress will earn you much more compliments anyways.
13. A modest and extremely cute flower-embroidered wrap dress you'll pull out for every special occasion and every award you win, because you need a dress as worthy as all the praise you receive.
15. A dreamy, sheer embroidered maxi for when you want to feel like a straight-up goddess on a special day, whether it's your wedding, engagement photoshoot, or your birthday party — this dress will celebrate you in the best way!
16. A pockets-included French Connection sheath dress known to be a bit of a style chameleon. Why? You can easily dress it down for work and all the way up for parties. It's on a mission to be your most worn closet item, even before the year ends — that's how ambitious and confident it is.
17. A ridiculously cozy cable knit sweater to keep you toasty whenever you *absolutely must* leave your home to do silly things like go to work, run errands, or meet up for brunch with friends.
18. A classy Jason Wu for Eloquii twist shoulder sheath masterpiece that'll make you say mysterious things like, "Oh yes, darling, this is obviously designer. I'd tell you how much I paid for it, but then I'd have to kill you." — you at your friend's Christmas party, probably.
19. A bell-sleeved velvet mini to immediately break out onto the dance floor — after all, these wide sleeves were made for grooving and flapping along to your favorite tunes!
20. A Gatsby-inspired stunner with plenty of sequins, sparkles, and old school glam to bring a bit of the 1920s back, because, as Fergie sings, ~a little party never killed nobody~.
21. A drapey french terry Kensie dress for an outfit that might just be better and more comfortable than sweats. There, I said it. Fight me if you wish, but we'd both be better off if you bought this dress instead.
22. A classic A-line dress with fluttery cap sleeves, a cinched waist, and a delicate back bow situation that'll have you singing its praises every time you wear it — so light, so swooshy, so pretty!
23. A satin faux wrap Express number that'll fulfill your holiday party's dress-up requirements without making you feel uncomfortable or restricted while you stuff yourself with free food and drinks *and* dance the night away!
24. A pattern-mixing ModCloth dress with a flared, high-low, skirt for the perfect mix of fancy and chic, without feeling over-the-top — you'll be lookin' like a world-class sculpture! (Belt not included, btw).
25. A sequined Dress the Population mini that might just give passerbys whiplash when you catch your ~sparkle~ as you walk by. Is this dress the excuse you've been looking for to book a fun Vegas or NOLA trip with the girls? Absolutely.
26. A sophisticated and only slightly dramatic Adrianna Papell cape sheath dress to make you feel like the hero of the night. Or just like someone who made a darn good fashion choice.
27. An exquisite bell-sleeve lace gown designed to ~impress~ everyone who comes your way. If they're not wowed, I'd be very concerned — "hello, sir/madame, do you not SEE the fabulousness in front of you?" —me, most likely, as your fashion hype person.
28. A satin-y mermaid gown that'll definitely make you feel like the belle of the ball/prom/gala — wherever you decide to honor everyone with your presence.
29. A darling georgette wrap dress adorned with wide kimono-inspired sleeves that actually has enough room up top for bigger-chested people — you know, how dresses should be designed.
30. A beautifully beaded full-length dress with sheer sleeves and a flowy bottom half perfect for starring in well-orchestrated Boomerangs all night long.
31. A delightful cactus and succulent themed ModCloth dress that'll be unlike anything else you already have in your closet — unless you're a cactus aficionado and own lots of cactus-print clothing, which is very impressive — and not to mention it has pockets and a playful v-shaped back. What's not to love?
32. An elegant, body-hugging crepe sheath slayer so you can feel like Audrey Hepburn whenever you very well please — that kind of feeling is priceless, don't you think?
You, lavishly displaying your new dresses for the whole world to see:
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