back to top

If We Bottled The Smells Of The Big City As Perfumes

Ahhhh yes, summer smells of the city. *GAGS*

Posted on

1. Hot Trash

rhockens/ flickr/ ThinkStock / Via Flickr: rhockens

This scent opens with old McDonald's and fermenting liquids — classic ingredients that marked the original. The heart includes notes of rat poison enriched with garbage bag chemicals. The base is a warm and sensual blend of disgust and overpopulation.

2. Body Odor

Michael Nagle / Getty Images / ThinkStock

This scent is aromatic, sour — a fougère composition with putrid onion notes, wet ass, corn chips and fig leaves at the top, and develops with a heart of cumin, vinegar, moldy cheese, and dreams of air conditioning.

3. Dog Shit

Burak Pekakcan / Getty Images / ThinkStock

Merde de Chien, or "Dog Shit," is a modern scent that combines the classic ingredients — coffee beans and rancid beef. There are also notes of neroli, geranium and learn-to-pick-up-after-your-goddamn-dog. The character of the fragrance is described as overbearing, offensive and omnipresent.


4. Burnt Street Meat & Smoke

rhockens/ flickr/ ThinkStock / Via Flickr: rhockens

The scent of several day old fat gives Burnt Street Meat and Smoke the feel of a summer night blended with fire and spices. Top notes of charred mystery meat are accompanied by fits of coughing and fainting.

5. Rancid Farts

Mark Lennihan / AP / ThinkStock

One of the most distinctive musky fragrances in this collection is Rancid Farts Cologne. It uses rich notes of sulfur, dairy, regret, patchouli and methane to create a heady, get-me-the-fuck-out-of-here aura.

6. Steaming Piss

Serpeblu / Getty Images

Fleur de Steaming Piss starts with pungent notes of tart and dusky asparagus combined with ammonia, lack of common decency, and green mandarin bark. The heat incorporates the key ingredient—fever-inducing vapor, which rises with garlic notes.