If Fairytale Characters Had Smart Phones (In Rhyme)

For anyone who has lamented Romeo and Juliet's lack of cellular devices.

If Fairy tales had smartphones,

I think it's safe to guess,

The world would be much simpler, and

We'd save a lot of stress.

Sarah Dean

One could trust with sheep galore

The most dishonest youth,

If, were a wolf to come explore,

They'd snap chat out the truth.

Sarah Dean

Chicken Little's well-meant lies

Could spread beyond his cluck

If only he had tweeted, "Guys,

The sky is falling! Duck!"

Sarah Dean

Royal narcissistic chicks

Might leave alone their tykes

If they could get their beauty fix

From Facebook selfie likes.

Sarah Dean

Princes yearning to be wed

Could search with greater ease

If Linkedin profiles rules instead

Of mattresses and peas.

Sarah Dean

Ugly sisters quick to slight

Those less endowed with riches

Could get out all their pent-up spite

As petty, Yik Yak bitches

Sarah Dean

Beasties plagued with low self-view

Might see themselves as catches

If only they could have a few

Successful Tinder matches.

No conflict would divide the land.

Long live the happy ending!

Each tale would end in rainbows

And in frenzied Facebook friending.

And kingdom-wide, from coast to coast,

Each prince, beast, bird, and bee

Would text, tweet, yak, like, snap, and post

In blissful harmony.

Sarah Dean

And they all lived Happily Every After.

The End.