I've had Ben & Jerry's ice cream.I have consumed an entire pint of Ben & Jerry's in one sitting.I have eaten Nutella by the spoonful.I have eaten peanut butter by the spoonful.I have eaten a cupcake in one bite.I have had a bottle of wine to myself.I own a Snuggie.I have a Netflix account.I watch Netflix on a weekly basis.I watch Netflix on a nightly basis.I have stayed in to watch Netflix on a Friday night instead of going out.My Netflix knows me better than I know myself.I own a cat.I own more than one cat.I haven't showered today.I haven't showered in the past two days.I haven't brushed my teeth today.I haven't done my laundry in two weeks.I haven't done my laundry in a month.I can't remember the last time I did my laundry.I talk to myself sometimes.I talk to myself A LOT.I haven't put on deodorant today.I just smelled my armpit, and it wasn't pleasant.My mom frequently asks if I am seeing anyone.My mom frequently asks when I am getting married.My mom frequently brings up grandkids.I hate Valentine's Day.I have stalked someone I am interested in on Facebook.I have stalked someone I am interested in on Twitter.I have stalked someone I am interested in on Instagram.I am on Tinder.I am on OKCupid.I have not been on a date in the last week.I have not been on a date in the last month.I have not been on a date in the last year.I can't remember the last time I have been on a date.I have never been on a date.I find myself fantasizing about fictional characters.I enjoy "The Lord of the Rings."I have not had sex in the last week.I have not had sex in the last month.I have not had sex in the last year.I am looking for "The One."I am just LOOKING.I don't have a gym membership.I have been the "third wheel."I have pooped someplace other than my home in the past year.I have pooped at my job.I have burped in the presence of another human being.I have farted in the presence of another human being.I enjoy Young Adult fiction.I enjoy the "Harry Potter" series.I listen to Taylor Swift.I own a pair of sweatpants.I have worn a pair of sweatpants in the last week.Mac n' cheese is a staple of my diet.I own a body pillow.I frequently bring up the benefits of being single, like "freedom" and "independence."People have mistaken the person next to you for your S.O. at parties.I frequently use the word "ugh."I have eaten pizza in the last week.I have eaten pizza in the last month.I have eaten pizza in the last year.I have gotten food on my shirt before.I have gotten food on my shirt before, and done nothing about it.I have been told I am a "catch."I have attended a wedding alone.I have binge-watched a television show.I have thought about having kids.I have fantasized about someone I am not dating.I have an office crush.I have a crush on someone who delivers/makes my food.I have masturbated in the past week.I have masturbated in the past month.I masturbate too much.I have eaten at a restaurant alone.I tell myself I am focusing on my job/career right now.I enjoy rom-coms.I have been to a bar alone.I enjoy listening to Adele.I enjoy watching "The Notebook."I enjoy watching "Love Actually.""Single Ladies" is my jam.People frequently tell me there is someone out there for me.I live alone.People tell me I am too picky.I really am too picky.I will laugh at someone's joke, even if it isn't funny, because I am attracted to them.I relate to Mindy Kaling.I relate to Tina Fey.I like Jennifer Lawrence.I like Beyonce.I live in a city.I usually don't cook for myself.I sing in the shower.I do yoga.I drink Diet Coke.I sometimes wonder if I will die alone.I have taken a quiz to determine how single I am.
How Single Are You Actually?
You are not single. Congrats on finding someone. May you live happily ever after!
You are sort of single. As Facebook would say, "It's complicated." You're playing the field, and it's working out well for you. Why give up on a good thing?
You are really single. Yeah, you are single, but you're making the most of your time flying solo. Keep doing your thing!
You are crazy single. You're smart, good-looking, the whole package, so it's just a matter of time before you find someone, right? RIGHT!?!
You are very, very single. Single life may be treating you well — maybe a little too well? Consider putting yourself on the market!
You are desperately single. Things COULD be worse, but maybe it's time to stop watching those rom-coms and find a real Romeo or Juliet.
You are hopelessly single. OK, maybe there is SOME hope, but only if you try. Get it together, because "The One" isn't going to wait for you forever!
You are completely and utterly single. Maybe it's time to get out of those sweatpants, put down the pizza and put yourself out there! There HAS to be someone for you, right?