1. Let's go in this with low expectations and we may be pleasantly surprised.
2. No, no. I'm still disappointed.
3. Hey, at least the lead is hot.
4. Am I sexist?
5. Probably.
6. Who put this on the air?
7. I could write this.
8. I could write this better than this.
9. I'm going to go write something better than this.
10. Oh, god, what is this piece of crap I've written?
11. Alright fine, I'll give it room to grow on me.
12. At least it's an original idea.
13. It's an adaptation of a Swedish show?
14. It would be an adaptation of a Swedish show.
15. Cable. This is why they invented cable.
16. And cat videos.
17. Oh man, have you seen that crazy panda one? Let's pull it up on my phone.
18. Look at that guy. Munching on a leaf.
19. Oh shit, I stopped paying attention.
20. What'd I miss?
21. Did they catch the guy?
22. There are too many commercials.
23. I feel the urge to buy Doritos.
24. No one's ever having that much fun with herpes.
25. Cotton IS the fabric of our lives.
26. I'm bored.
27. It's back.
28. Maybe I'll just wait for it to come out on Netflix.
29. What if I emotionally invest and then they cancel it?
30. This is the source of all my commitment issues.