Bullying- What It Taught Me...
As I reach my mid 20's lately it sickens me how school's haven't changed when it comes to bullying. It feels like we're still stuck in the 90's where the administration is terrified of the parent's, but tied to the system so they can't actually do anything for justice until the cops get involved for harassment charges.
Recently, a Facebook friend of mine posted about how she has to go into her daughter's school because some one made her cry 3 times throughout the day and nothing was being done about it, and as a parent it's her right and duty to make sure her child get's justice and the harassment stops, and I couldn't agree more with her. Her child shouldn't be subjected to the assholes of the world, and quite frankly, the kid in question needs to be stopped.
It brought me back to my awful childhood where I was constantly bullied and made fun of all the time. I was a special ed student first of all, and the "quiet/weird one" as people referred me too.
My bullying started in 6th grade, and I dealt with it all through out high school. This bully broke me down emotionally and mentally. She made fun of me every chance she got, and got my classmates against me and made my life a living hell. I would go home crying on a regular basis, hating myself and my life and wondering why I was being treated so horribly.
What really bugs me to this day is that the teachers in my school did nothing about it to stop it. My 6th grade teacher knew I was being harassed and made fun of all the time. Parent teacher conferences and phone calls to the principal were often made, but nothing was done. I asked to be switched to a different class, but they said "No" because they thought keeping me in the environment would make the kids stop making fun of me. Seriously? How the hell does this logic make ANY sense? Sure, let's keep the kid who's being harassed in the same environment instead of taking her out of it...
As I got older in high school it didn't stop. I still had to deal with mean cruel people, but in high school you can't really escape it because no one does anything to stop it if it's a typical he said/ she said. After awhile in high school teacher's were my escape. I was close to the faculty because I knew that if I was in a classroom I couldn't be made fun of directly. During lunches I would hide in the computer room or in the library. The staff knew me well, and they didn't mind that I spent a lot of time in their rooms.
By the time my senior year hit, I was drained. Just sick of everything and sick of constantly being burned day after day. I was often so quiet during my classes that teachers forgot I was there. My depression was bad, I had just lost my father due to a two year colon cancer battle and my mother was fighting breast cancer. School was my last concern, and to be honest- I didn't really give two shits about being there in the first place. Between that and the bullying my so called group of "friends" ditched me, and started avoiding me for whatever unknown reason. They kept me out of plans, talked about me, whispered whenever they'd see me in the hall. Making me even more vulnerable and upset since I didn't do anything to them in the first place. I felt so alone and invisible. Life just didn't seem fair.
Things got better once I got to college. I went to Landmark College in Putney, Vermont. A school for kids with A.D.D. and Learning Disabilities. Everyone had similar backgrounds education wise, and it was a place where I finally felt accepted and loved for who I was, and I thrived socially.
I was Campus Activities Board President, a Resident Assistant, Game Room Manager, Book Store Work Study Student, Orientation Leader, and a Student Affairs office assistant through out my two years there. I had real friends who would do anything for me and I would do anything for them. After College I had moved onto an internship for The Walt Disney World Company, and now I'm a Receptionist in New York City where my office is currently working on The Hudson Yards Project.
Being bullied taught me about love and compassion as I got older. As a Resident Assistant I was good with the emotional problems. That's what students mostly came for me for because they always said I was easy to talk to and I would actually listen to them.
I'm very intuitive and empathetic to to people and my surroundings. Being bullied taught me to appreciate kindness and to not take the simple things in life for granted. I guess I see the world differently because of the things I was put through when I was younger, but it's made me a stronger individual. I often try to pay it forward whenever I can. Even if it's just as simple as waiting on the taxi line and giving a family behind me a cab if they're in a rush and need to be somewhere before I do. Little acts of kindness go a long way.
Now since we're in the year 2014, school administration's need to be more on top of the zero tolerance policies or whatever the school has in their handbooks. Being bullied is a serious offense, and can really break a person's spirit. Looking back, it really did a number on me, but it also made me a stronger person knowing I triumphed and accomplished more then the people in my graduating class ever did.
That was my good karma, and I'll keep continuing to pay it forward.
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