Top 5 Worst Lines To Seduce A Virgin

Touched for the very last time...

1. "Get your awkwardness out on me."

Ahh, the poetry of this. Can you imagine if this was a song? Too bad the word awkwardness is such a mouthful of chalk. But seriously now, virgins are virgins because they're awkward or because they're waiting to be romanced so this line only heightens self-consciousness.

2. "Everyone our age has HPV."

Do they really? Or is this rationalization? Kudos for actually admitting it, but you took a dive with the attempt to downplay it. Virgins tend to bring up STDs more than the average person because well—they don't have any. If you're trying to seduce a virgin and are not prepared with protection, then don't dismiss diseases as though they're moles.

3. “I’m bad at sex too.”

Everyone wants to believe they'll be good at sex, even before they do it. And if they have managed to get ego out of the way, then they probably hope their partner will be able to help them through the experience. And even with THOSE two things out of the way, in the case with a couple in love, then saying this at all is not necessary. Don't put yourself nor someone you want to have sex with down; it sours the mood, even if it might not kill it.

4. "What a waste."

At first, this might seem like a compliment: "You're wasting your potential!" But it reduces a person to their sexual experience and that's not wordplay that leads to foreplay. Don't make a person feel worthless for their choices or circumstances. We worry a lot about slut-shaming; let's be compassionate about virgin-shaming as well.

5. "It'll be quick/it'll hurt."

You never know how it will be. Go into it thinking it will be fun and pleasurable and more often than not it WILL be fun and pleasurable. Negativity, presumptions, and insensitivity in the mind is what taints sex, not physical mechanics. Why make it a scoreboard? Sex is about enjoying the journey, not anticipating roadblocks on the destination.