17 Upsetting Recipes From The '70s That Will Kill Your Appetite
Not everything vintage is cool.
As far as the decades go, the 1970s were far out. Disco, bell bottoms, The Brady Bunch. But some things are better left in the past, like these recipes from the 1971 Betty Crocker card catalogue. Here's a countdown of the least appetizing recipes we came across, from those that aren't so groovy to those that are grody to the max.
17. Glamorous Grapefruit
The fruit salad cups themselves look great, but the sad, gloopy yogurt seems a little too pink. It does win a few Fergie points for being G-L-A-M-O-R-O-U-S tho. #flossyflossy
16. Fonduloha
This so-called "American Classic" starts off with potential, with what looks like a tropical chicken salad. Could be a total win. But once the recipe calls for peanuts, bananas, and a pineapple boat, it's just too much.
15. Round Steak 'N Ravioli
Zucchini, mushroom spaghetti sauce, and canned ravioli. This is the kind of thing I imagine being put on the table in the '70s with the warning, "You'll eat it and you'll like it."
14. Curried Fish in Rice Ring
Dive right into this above-ground swimming pool of curried fish. No takers besides that simple garnish of... kumquats? I'm not sure.
13. Cheese-Egg Bake
It's like the photo was taken by someone who Instagrams their food in all the worst ways. Or like Martha Stewart's food tweets.
12. Chicken Fricassee with Dumplings
This one might taste OK, but Betty Crocker calls it a "Men's Favorite," here to please your man. Excuse me while I vom.
11. Seafood Coquilles
"International Favorite!" This frozen seafood and condensed cream of shrimp soup pie will make you feel like you're dining on the streets of Paris!
10. Plantation Ham Pie
The Parsley Pinwheels look OK, maybe a little undercooked, but the slop on the bottom is a no. Even less cool is the use of "plantation" to casually describe a casserole.
9. Pink Bavarian Cream
The saddest shade of mauve you've ever seen, and if you look a little closer, it's stained a nice brown around the edges. NOPE NOPE NOPE.
8. Cheeseburger Pie
Literally a compressed pie of ground beef with "cheese topping" and ketchup that looks like finger paint.
7. Frank-Bean Bake
Problem number one: The meal is primarily beans mixed with mushroom spaghetti sauce. Problem number two: Symmetric lines of glistening hot dogs.
6. Sombrero Pie
Gates of cornmeal pastry unfold and open up to a underworld of slimy ground meats. No gracías.
5. Bologna Biscuits with Vegetables
Be better than bologna biscuits.
4. Ribbon Meat Loaf
If Cheeseburger Pie isn't your thing, and you'd rather have your ground beef and cheese molded together in a gelatinous log, this meatloaf is here for you.
3. Lime Ribbon Delight
This cake looks downright radioactive, and chunky in all the wrong places.
2. Man-Pleasing Appetizers
This dish is literally just chicken livers with a side of steaming beef broth. If you can stomach the actual recipe, the concept of "Man-Pleasing Appetizers" is still embarrassing for everyone involved.
1. Steamed Holiday Pudding
The worst of the worst is this holiday "Gift From Your Kitchen". 'Tis the season for what looks like sawdust and topsoil mixed together and pressed into a Bundt pan. Also, the recipe calls for 2 cups of ground suet, or beef fat. I think this is where Rachel Green got her trifle recipe.