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If you're unfamiliar with the Power Pressure Cooker, allow me to introduce you.
It's vouched for by "Acclaimed Chef And Culinary Expert Eric Theiss."
He literally loves cooking so much that he smiles while he does it.
He always makes sure that his ingredients are fresh, even if it means hooking up with them in public.
But things start getting very weird as the infomercial begins to kick into high gear.
First of all, why is everybody named Denise?
And secondly, why is literally every single thing they cook so fucking disgusting?
Well, she seems to like it, so maybe it's not as bad as it looks.
But then a smash cut to this hunk of meat and it's back to the side eye.
Even Denise starts to showcase some anxiety when the Beef Stroganoff makes an appearance.
As she should because...
The kidnaped cowboys in the background seem to be loving it.
"Acclaimed Chef And Culinary Expert Eric Theiss" then decides to fuck Denise up a little bit more.
This isn't your grandmother's slow cooker, y'all.
It's so much fucking worse.
These meals, and that shoulder grab, are acts of violence.
Is "Acclaimed Chef And Culinary Expert Eric Theiss" FUCKING KIDDING me?
These people are monsters.
We then get a satisfied customer review from Elizabeth J., who clearly hates her family.
Like must absolutely haaaaate them
I'M TALKING. LOATHE. THEM.
Literally no food is sacred.
????
Just quickly double checking that these are cans.
Things go from bad to worse.
LITERAL DUNG
THIS UNGODLY COLOR
JUST THINGS
THE CLAM CHOWDER MAKING A SECOND CAMEO
Then, "Acclaimed Chef And Culinary Expert Eric Theiss" manages to find his most cruel victim.
And lastly, a quick highlight reel.
Where is your God now?
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