1.
when ur underage in wetherspoons & see the bouncer coming
2.
How funny is that 'oop' noise u make when u walk into someone
3.
Saw ur mum's finally retiring.
4.
When your going out wi the lads at 6 but you've got to ride the Valhalla Blackpool pleasure beach ride at 7
5.
"I love these tasty human potato sticks" "Chips, Theresa, they are called..." "STRONG AND STABLE POTATO STICKS"
6.
If you buy sandwiches like these from corner shops I can't trust you.
7.
Wtf cos a always watch This Morning n tell ma mum a pure love Philip schofield she's went n got this made 😂😂😂😂 deed
8.
When he tells you he's a Tory
9.
How sad is it that one day was the last time you went out to play with ur pals n you never even realised it 😟
10.
'Shhh I've only had 5 beers.' 'You've had 15.' 'It's closer to 10.'
11.
When the ref asks to see ur studs before kick off
12.
Cannot unsee.
13.
Vowel please Nicki
14.
bae: Come over May: I'm pretending to meet real people for the cameras bae: There's a child here eating a free scho… https://t.co/vOtx9nXiVo
15.
autoglass: autoglass repair me: autoglass replace
16.
Winds so strong that York is getting blown to the coast
17.
@Tesco transfer me 10,000 club card points and you can have it back
18.
Paul Gascoigne says he used to think news stories on the Gaza Strip were about him http://t.co/n8hr52LuKK
19.
If Labour wins I want my £27k refund back in my account in 3-5 working days
20.
When you're struggling to reach the word count whilst writing an essay
21.
Childish snigger
22.
New Pope at Morrisons
23.
Lenny Henry is home!
24.
Sitcom
25.
Another lacklustre effort from Enid Blyton
26.
It's the remix to ignition Hot and fresh out the kitchen 4,000 homes for rough sleepers And you won't have to pay f… https://t.co/6gNfp8Lphx
27.
I sleep with my grandad's WWII bayonet under my pillow. You never know when someone might break in and start filming Antiques Road Show.
28.
why does britney look like it's her first night out for freshers week??
29.
Today is gonna be the day that they're gonna throw it back to you
30.
Imagine coming to wetherspoons dressed as one of the plates...
31.
Life has gone downhill for postman pat and his cat
32.
Coming soon to ITV2: BURNHAM, a tough northern detective who breaks the rules but always gets results.
33.
It's great how the Eggheads have now been given Gladiator-style names.