Buzz·Posted on 31 Jul 201732 Tweets So Funny You'll Almost Forget About 2017You needed this. Trust us.by Robin EddsBuzzFeed StaffLinkFacebookPinterestTwitterMail 1. joey @joeyz95 When your straight friend Jean makes a funny joke 09:06 PM - 23 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 2. Ray @rayy_baybay Thanks for the clarification, Dad. 12:48 PM - 21 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 3. Emily Barry @EmiBarry "Wow 3 tattoos.. those are pretty permanent you know" Me: wow 3 kids... those are pretty damn permanent CAROL 02:51 AM - 26 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 4. ace @iamalishajo my ubereats delivery man decided to be a smart ass...... 10:27 PM - 17 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 5. Mark Lazerus @MarkLazerus Well, that doesn't seem like a proportional response. 11:02 PM - 25 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 6. Ben @islandniles That don't impress me much 11:04 AM - 21 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 7. childish sadbino @datassque yall tired of boiling water every time you make pasta? boil a few gallons at the beginning of the week and freeze it for later. 02:47 AM - 30 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 8. Philly Byrne 🥔 @PhilipNByrne When you're so high on dentist gas the Water Buffalo Of Drugs visits you. 03:26 PM - 18 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 9. some quack 🎤🦆 @hurlarious my fav colour is also hitler 07:59 PM - 23 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 10. Jessie Char @jessiechar Today, I flew on the set of a nightmare. 05:15 AM - 19 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 11. E-LOVE 💔 @BRUHNICEVIDEO We all deal with grief in different ways 07:01 PM - 14 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 12. Barnesy @3arnesy Delivery guy: Could I use your toilet? Me: Yes sure it's the door under the stairs. Delivery guy: Which one? Me: Er… https://t.co/GOtRgbkxsd 01:20 PM - 27 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 13. Purp @Purpdapurp "You lucky this man holding me back. Next time you say my moms neck game crazy he won't be here to save yo ass" 06:22 PM - 15 Oct 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 14. Brendan O'Hare @brendohare A simple way to help you remember how to spell "honey" 07:55 PM - 17 Jul 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 15. Geraint @geraintgriffith When sequels go bad... 05:56 AM - 10 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 16. Joel Willans @Joelwillans Riley, you're a genius. 09:08 AM - 30 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 17. Daniel @DannyDutch I'm no geologist but this is quite an interesting Rock formation. 06:57 PM - 25 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 18. A bi gal @abbynotabigail_ Me: Who needs antidepressants? I'll just listen to Hey Ya by Outkast daily Narrator: But things were not alright alright alright alright 04:26 AM - 22 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 19. Harry Moore @Harry_Moore_ more bad news for single people 12:40 PM - 19 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 20. goth turtle @dubstep4dads my mom asked me for a pic of ed sheeran and i tried to be funny and i edited it i didnt know she was gonna frame it… https://t.co/hjxeapKCI0 11:23 PM - 13 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 21. Matt Roller @rolldiggity When a witch says your tongue has to float in the middle of your mouth without touching anything or you'll die. 03:39 AM - 12 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 22. poikazansu @poika_ dont you just love slow burn 02:51 AM - 09 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 23. adult dark sheep @chaeronaea the four genders 10:50 PM - 28 Jun 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 24. rudy mustang @rudy_mustang Me: could i have a pepsi Waiter: is pepsi ok- OMG *eyes getting watery* finally Me: *smiling through tears* yeah *we kiss* 11:39 PM - 02 Jun 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 25. Ben McCool @BenMcCool Another juggler gives up on his dreams... 04:31 PM - 02 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 26. Deep Web Italian @Deno_Tron Roommate has date coming by later and asked me to clean bc he's not home. So I made a Princess D shrine in his room 01:05 AM - 01 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 27. 28. Anna @annagrayy Sideshow Bob's on the move 07:04 PM - 28 Jun 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 29. rat mic @loopzoop Me in court: your honor i would like to plead guilty as well as request the death penalty Judge: this....is a parking ticket.... 12:35 AM - 25 Jun 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 30. Molly Robbins @MCreativeCakes Text from mum - having trouble sticking lashes on without her glasses.. turns out she was trying to glue a dead fly… https://t.co/LkZ5ECF9uQ 07:21 AM - 29 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 31. Ian Kingston @IanJKingston WIFE: This is for a tweet isn't it... 01:00 PM - 22 May 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 32. Eric Thomas @EricThomas_311 Shark week is actually the safest time to go to the beach because all the sharks are busy being on TV 10:49 PM - 24 Jul 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite