1. Because it's always a conversation starter.
2. Because you learn to take the rough.
3. With the smooth.
4. Because you fail to see what's not normal about chips, cheese, and gravy.
5. Because life there is pretty peaceful.
6. So you learn how to cope with just...hanging around.
7. Because you understand that your life will never be quite the same without Griddles.
That's one smug-looking Colonel.