1.
When the G&T isn't quite right.
2.
When Surrey life gets you down.
3.
When you bought all that avocado for nothing.
4.
When you know that they don't have to put up with this shit in Sainsbury's.
5.
When the word "free" comes with a very real price.
6.
When you know what you can't live without but others disagree.
7.
When they know how to hit you where it hurts.
8.
When it's not just the lemons leaving a sour taste in your mouth.
9.
When you get shit for liking the finer things in life.
10.
When you try something new and instantly regret it.
11.
When your worst fears are realised.
12.
When you see how the other half live. If you can call it a life...
13.
When you're forced to take a gamble with non-organic produce.
14.
When you're not mad. You're just disappointed.
15.
When quality control lets you down.
16.
When you realise you could do so much better.
17.
I mean what self respecting shopper can go without a rotisserie?
18.
When they refuse to give you all the free things.
19.
When they definitely don't know the rule.
20.
When it's 7am and you need your sourdough fix.
21.
When you know that British asparagus > all other asparagus.
22.
When you want your sea herbs and you want them now.
23.
When betrayal feels so much worse when it's from the people you love the most.
24.
When you don't want to know about fast-churned butter.
25.
When it never rains but it pours.
26.
When you've been wronged and demand retribution.
27.
When your Nebuchadnezzar won't fit in the bottle bank.
28.
And finally, when you realise that maybe – just maybe – everything will be OK.