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    Nargis Fakhri's New Boyfriend Is Literally A Piece Of Shit

    WHAT IS EVEN HAPPENING. WHATEVER IT IS, IT'S AMAZING.

    Soooo, this maniacal love story began a couple of months ago, when Nargis Fakhri told us all in an Instagram video that a friend of hers had gotten her a present.

    Nargis Fakhri / Via Instagram: @nagrilove

    She then GLEEFULLY revealed that the present was a giant stuffed poop emoji.

    And it was love at first sight.

    Nargis Fakhri / Via Instagram: @nagrilove

    Immediately, the regal turd – often referred to as Mr. Fecal – began accompanying her everywhere.

    He started going to sets with Nargis and hanging with the crew.

    When she did a swimsuit shoot for Femina, he came along and did some sunbathing of his own.

    Femina
    https://instagram.com/p/1NkYZdlKjt/

    Learning quickly from his companion and soulmate, Mr. Fecal picked up some impressive modeling skills.

    But it's not all work for Fecal and Fakhri. Here they are getting completely hammered.

    And like any normal couple, they even have adorable, lazy nights in together.

    Then, about a week ago, it looked like their relationship was on the rocks. Mr. Fecal was gettin' clingy.

    Back in Mumbai and off to work we goooooooooo... i think Mr. Fecal wants to come along..shall i bring him, he's just staring at me smiling.

    But they clearly worked things out because he did, indeed, go to another shoot with her.

    They cuddled all through hair and makeup.

    And he even got his own hair done. #StyleGoals

    Last week, Nargis was spotted leaving for a vacation in Kenya with Mr. Fecal in tow.

    He enjoyed an in-flight glass of champagne while she looked on lovingly.

    And clearly all that alcohol had him feeling preeettyyy affectionate.

    Together, they enjoyed a Kenyan wildlife safari and even took in the sights at the equator.

    And they did all the totally normal, sane things that any lovebirds on vacation do.

    Here's to the happy couple! πŸ’• πŸ’©

    Sorry, men. She's really, really taken.

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