15 Signs You're Addicted To Candy Crush Saga

This is a no-shame zone.

1. You Know the "Infinite Lives" Trick

Apple

For the unacquainted with iPhones: Settings > General > Date & Time > Toggle off "Set Automatically" > Change the date to a day in the future > Navigate into Candy Crush > Make sure you now have a full set of lives > Navigate back into Settings > Toggle on "Set Automatically" > Play on with new lives and correct phone date/time.

2. Knowledge of Said Trick Has Totally Ruined Your Life

Bravo

Bye bye, friends.

3. You Match Candies In Your Sleep

giphy.com

Must... Get... Color Bomb...

4. You Get Antsy When You Don't Have Your Phone in Your Hand

BBC

You're not a psychopath, though. (You're a high-functioning sociopath.)

5. The Highest Level You've Reached is No Longer Grounds for Bragging, but Rather Grounds for Pity

juzzodiac.tumblr.com

But you can't stop. You won't stop. Can't they see it's you who owns the night?

6. If Someone is Playing Next to You, You Have to Fight the Urge to Backseat Drive

NBC

But... THERE... if you just... ughhhhhh.

7. Watching This is Ridiculously Satisfying

King

Awww yeahhh, the holy grail. Watch them candies BURN.

8. There's Something Bittersweet About This Message

King

You think to yourself: I have succeeded at an incredibly difficult pursuit, and I am not one iota better for it. Hm, maybe I should stop playing this game and use this time to engage in more productive and fulfilling activities.

... Nahhhhh.

9. So Now You Have to Make a Choice:

King

Do you annoy the shit out of your fellow addicts on Facebook, use the infinite lives trick to slog through the quests, or do you — perish the thought — spend 99 cents to proceed?

10. There Are At Least Five Levels That Almost Made You Quit For Good

King

"What — I don't — I can't — nope, no way. They've finally got me."

11. Many Weeks Of Toil Later...

King

"I DID IT. HOLY SHIT. I DESERVE A FUCKING MEDAL. I HAVE CONQUERED THE UNCONQUERABLE. THANK YOU JESUS!!"

12. The Names of the Candy Worlds Make You Feel Like This Game Is Definitely Not Meant for Your Age Bracket

King

"All right, let's kick some ass in the... uh... Biscuit... Bungalow."

13. You Hate Dream World

King

"Odus, you useless sack of feathers, stay on your fucking moon where you fucking belong. I matched ONE set of candy. ONE. And WHOO, off you go again, making that stupid panic face and dancing like a dick. Get your cerebellum checked, asshole."

14. You Advocate the Superiority of Crush Over All Other Puzzle Games

Paramount Pictures

Even if you don't necessarily believe it's true.

15. And No Matter How Many Times You Fail At This Diabolical Game, You Will Never, EVER, Give Up

FOX

Let's face it: You couldn't even if you wanted to.