Here's How 14 People Describe The Way They Came To Terms With Their Bisexual Identity

"I was just missing the word for it."

BuzzFeed Brazil asked readers on Facebook who identified as bisexual about how they first came to understand their identity — here's what they said:

Note: Responses have been translated and edited for clarity.

1. "There was already a name for it."

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"I realized that I was bisexual after deciding that identifying as 'heteroflexible' was ridiculous — since there was already a name for it. And it was with Sailor Moon that I realized that I also liked girls." —Sofia Caldeira

2. "I even imagined myself as a man, because I thought that would be the only way to get with girls."

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"I realized in the seventh grade that I wanted to be with girls. Sometimes I even imagined myself as a man, because I thought that would be the only way to get with girls. After a while, I understood that that was a real possibility, even though I was a woman. But for a long time, I just went out with guys, until, in college, I started going out with girls as well." —Thaís Borges de Araújo

3. "I dated him for almost a year online before discovering that he was a girl."

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"I discovered that I was bi when I met a guy on Tumblr at 14, and I fell in love with him. I dated him for almost a year online before discovering that he was a girl. I decided that I wanted to carry on with the relationship, and I started to realize that gender didn't make a difference to me. I felt attracted to her. At the time, I was pissed about the pretense, but not about her gender. We're still together, six years later." —Gabriela

4. "Even though I was in a serious relationship with a man, I still liked women."

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"I realized that I was attracted to women when I was still a teenager, and I completely repressed the feeling because I was evangelical. I was unsure if it meant that I was a lesbian. It was only when I went to college that I realized that I didn't need to be one or the other; I could be both. That's when I got with a bi friend for the first time and better understood my possibilities.

Despite that, it was always difficult to know whether I was really bisexual. I became more sure about myself when I noticed that, even though I was in a serious relationship with a man, I still liked women. A lot of people question the bisexuality of women who are in a relationship with a man, but it actually just helped me to be sure about who I am." —Aline Ramos

5. "I ended up in the back seat of a car with a guy and a girl, and I realized that I wanted both of them."

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"I always found it weird when my friends talked about cute boys. I felt the same way, but I also felt that way about girls. I didn't have any friends who talked about that, so I just left it alone.

Then, when I was 14, I started making new friends, and one of them was a lesbian. That's when I thought that I could be one, too. But what about the attraction and lust I felt for boys? I finally gained more clarity when, at age 17, I ended up in the back seat of a car with a guy and a girl (my first girlfriend), and I realized that I wanted both of them — I was attracted to and desired both of them.

Today, at the age of 30, I realize that my sexuality is extremely fluid, that I am attracted to men and women, I can have feelings for both, and it's okay to be how I am." —Michele Bernardes

6. "Anyway, after that, I dated a lesbian who pressured me to call myself a lesbian. It wasn't comfortable at all..."

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"My mom asked me if I had dated one of my girlfriends when I was 12. I thought it was absurd; I'd never even kissed anybody at that point. But when I was 16, I was totally in love with a girl from school, but I thought I was crazy or that maybe I was being influenced by my LGBT friends.

Then, when I was 18, I finally got with a girl at a party and realized that what I felt for my girlfriends was something else. When I decided to tell my mom and my friends, all that I heard was: 'We already knew, and we were just waiting for the right time.' Anyway, after that, I dated a lesbian who pressured me to call myself a lesbian. It wasn't comfortable at all and it was very confusing, because I really liked her and ended up calling myself something that I wasn't. At the end of the day, it couldn't carry on: I either liked her or I liked myself.

Anyway, I'm bisexual, yes. It was confusing and painful at times, but I found myself in a space that belongs to me." —Nicole Morghana

7. "I tried to convince myself that I just admired the male body."

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"As a teenager, I began to accept my bisexuality more. Since I was 9, I had been attracted to both genders, but, because of the stigma, I hid my feelings for boys even from myself. Without anybody to talk to, I tried to convince myself that I just admired the male body.

But, when I started using the internet more, I began to understand sexuality more and more. When I finally decided to tell someone, I didn't get the expected response, so more than a year passed before I opened up again. On the second try, I was the catalyst for half of my friends to come out as well." —Wander Castro

8. "One moment I was attracted to a guy and thought 'Sweet, so now I'm normal.' The next moment I caught myself staring at a girl friend's mouth and feeling desire."

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"The discovery of the term 'bisexual' was a very important moment for me. In reality, I always knew that I liked girls and boys, but I thought that it was really wrong and weird. It was really confusing during my preteens. One moment I was attracted to a guy and thought, 'Sweet, so now I'm normal.' The next moment I caught myself staring at a girl friend's mouth and feeling desire, so I felt 'bad' and pulled away.

I always really liked to read, and there was one time when I read a story about a girl who had multiple personalities, and I began to think that was me. For a while, I was very curious about the spiritual world, and I began to write off the times that I was attracted to girls as a kind of possession. This was all until a Portuguese teacher — the coolest in my life — decided to explain to an eighth grade class what the acronym LGBTS meant, and that the B wasn't for biscuit." —Aline Noêmia

9. "It happened when I was a kid and saw my first Shakira music video."

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"It happened when I was a kid and saw my first Shakira music video. That day with Shakira was really significant. I was a child and didn't think much about those things, but I saw the woman on TV and fell head over heels. So much so that I remember my mom seeing me glued to the TV and shouting, 'CLOSE YOUR MOUTH! WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU?' When I grew up, I remembered that day and realized: It was then." —Suzane Jardim

10. "There will be moments when you like one gender more than another."

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"It was the biggest crisis in my mind because what they don't tell you is that there will be moments when you like one gender more than another. I worried about it throughout my teens, thinking that I was 100% hetero and just curious.

Then, as an adult, I took some time to be sure that I was really bisexual and that, in fact, it's completely normal to be interested just in women or just in men at a time. It was like I'd always known, but saying it out loud made me realize what I had doubted so many times before, and then it all made sense." —Heloísa Kennerly

11. "We feel like real ETs, outside all the constructed boxes and, many times, sad and alone."

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"Since I was a teenager, I saw my attraction to women as something related to a lack of self-esteem, something that bordered on a sort of 'I want to be that pretty' feminine rivalry.

I only realized the truth when I dated a woman and fell in love with her. And, because of that massive realization, I concluded that I must be a lesbian. After all, relationships with men were almost always tense and marred by a lot of chauvinism and gender expectations (that I thought I always disappointed).

But then, I met a guy who I got along with from the beginning, and I realized that I liked him. That was another story. 'WHAT? I'm not a lesbian? Why do I like a guy?'

So I realized that I was still interested in men. Sometimes affection and physical attraction go together, and other times they're separate. And I think that's the most difficult and painful thing to understand about bisexuality, because invisibility, even within the LGBT movement, makes it difficult for people to understand those nuances about us and about what we feel. Until we understand that, we feel like real ETs, outside all the constructed boxes and, many times, sad and alone." —Keyty Medeiros

12. "I was just missing the word for it."

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"As a child, I always found it strange that people only liked one thing, because, in my mind, everything was beautiful. And when I discovered what it meant to like people, I felt that I could like anyone. It was cute. I found myself thinking about boys and girls. I think I always had that understanding; I was just missing the word for it, which I discovered as a teenager." —Kaique Oliveira Fontes

13. "I grew up in a bisexual home, where there was a kind of suspicion about what we were, but nobody ever said anything about it."

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"Ever since I can remember, I always saw myself as somebody who liked both boys and girls, but I didn't know that it had a name. I grew up in a home where I was never asked what I was or who I liked, so I always had a lot of liberty with my sexuality.

When I turned 19, a few months before my parents died, my mother revealed to me that she was bisexual (I thought that she was a lesbian) and that she already knew about me. At the same time, she also told me that my dad was bisexual (I had already suspected it).

So, I grew up in a bisexual home, where there was a kind of suspicion about what we were, but nobody ever said anything about it. I never faced any prejudice from my family, which was something that helped me a lot in the acceptance process. I know that's not the reality for the large majority, but I'm very happy for being part of a story where bis created the bi-son that I am today." —Davi Oliveira

14. "I talked about it with a few friends on Tumblr from the bisexual community, and they taught me all about bisexuality."

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"It was a process that lasted from the ages of 17 to 19. I began to realize it when I started becoming attracted to women. But I was dating a man at the time, so I was confused. I talked about it with a few friends on Tumblr from the bisexual community, and they taught me all about bisexuality...Above all, they made me feel accepted." —Clarice França

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This post was translated from Portuguese.