10 Things That Make A Woman A Woman
Todays society has many outlets and resources for implementing norms. Social institutions are just one example of how pressure is imposed on people to conform to a social norm and become docile bodies. Women face a lot of pressure to act in a specific manner in order to correctly fulfill their womanly roles. The social obligations imposed on women are used as guidelines to define womanhood. The ten articles below address the varying types of social obligations women are expected to partake in, for example marriage and motherhood. Women's oppression and liberation may be tied into perspective with a women's social obligation. The fact that a women has her own specific social obligations supports the fact that society works to strengthen the differences between men and women.
1. Here Comes The Bride
Marriage is a social insitution that women are expected to take part in. From a young age girls have been taught that the best day of their lives is their wedding day. Conditioning young girls to believe that marriage is a natural and almost biological practice in humanity places a lot of pressure on women to follow through with their predestined path. Finding a husband has been taught to be a priorty to many women, and failure to do so suggests in a failed life. Along with the pressure to to be married, society has constructed a social timeline that if one is not in line with they face scrutiny and embarrassment. There is an expected age for marriage and once a women passes the "prime" age of marriage they often feel embarsessed and hopeless. According to Chrys Ingraham's, "One is Not Born a Bride", "Weddings work as a form of ideological control" (Ingraham, 306). Ingraham argues that weddings are a "rite of passage" (Ingraham, 307) which supports the claim that women are under pressure to get married in order to be normal in society. Along with just getting married women are under pressure to have the best wedding. Bridezillas a televison show displays women going crazy over their weddings and how their wedding day comes before relationships and the feelings of others. Marriage is a social obligation for women because society has established marriage as a natural event through norms and religion. Marriage is a social obligation because it shows that women are capable of securing a man, relationship and possibly a family. Establishing that the best day of a women's life is her wedding day disempowers women by suggesting that a women's best day must incorporate another persons presence. A women is seen to rely on others to achieve her happiness which is a social obligation that aids in the oppression of women.
Ingraham, Chrys. "“One is Not Born a Bride: How Weddings Regulate Sexuality"." The New Sexuality Studies: A Reader, 2e, edited by Seidman, Meeks, and Fisher. London: Routledge, 2011.
2. Size 2's Only
Physical appearance plays a major role in todays society in terms of priorities and obligations. Physical appearance is expected to be maintained in order to be a civil and docile member of society. Weight and physique are expected to be maintained in order to show ones dedication to their body. However, the pressure on women to have the perfect body and fit in the small gap of what constitutes beauty drives women to extremes. The desire to have a body that mimics what is portrayed by pop culture and the media leaves women finding fault in what they naturally look like. Women are expected to care about their bodies, even as the female body is commonly labeled as a sexual object. Working out has also become glamorized through the media for example, in Nike commercials and in PINK athletic wear. The pressure to be a size two in todays western society is slowly becoming normal. The social obligation that women are supposed to workout and care about their bodies fitting in an image constructed by social norms is an issue that is slowly becoming "naturalized". According to Fatimi Mernissi in her work "Size 6: A Western Women's Harem", there are varying perspectives on what women's oppression is, based on different perspectives. For example she addresses how some westerners view the hijab as a tool of oppression however, she claims that western women are under oppression by being forced to weigh a certain amount to be deemed beautiful. Mernissi enters a department store in New York City and is rejected because she does not fit the size two box. Physical appearance plays a major role in a women's confidence due to how society treasures the concept. Body size and social expectations have come into conflict for example in the issues transpiring from the brand Abercrombie&Fitch, who claim that their clothes are designed for a only a select group of body types, discriminating against the rest. Physical appearance is a social obligation that drives women to believe that their physical appearance is what makes them who they are. Anorexia and depression are just two common results of the pressure women are under to fit todays definition of beauty.
"Faterna Mernissi Size Six the Western Womens Harem" StudyMode.com. 07 2012. 2012. 07 2012 .
3. The F in Female is For Fashion
Along with caring about appearance women are expected to be infatuated and keep up with the newest trends in the fashion industry. Fashion plays a huge role in a tools for expressing ones self. However fashion is stereotyped to be a social obligation for women because it is supposed to show that they care about their physical appearance and how the world views them. Different outfits have different connotations although clothing is clothing. Women are expected to "dress the part" of how they wish to be perceived. If a women is wearing low cut and tight clothing to the mall or work she may be labeled with derogatory terms. A women's clothing has been established as a tool society may use to label or judge her. The media also perpetuates the importance of fashion by being the overall theme of mediums such as a magazines. Images and luring catchphrases are the basis of selling fashion and making fashion seem like a necessity for a women. For example Fashion Magazine, is a world famous magazine that has all the latest trends as well as tips and tricks for maintaining beauty. The pressure to conform to certain types of fashion is evident in todays society because women fear being labeled or judged. "Reforming Women's Fashion" by Cunningham, addresses the history women's fashion has undergone, through trends from lace and corsets to women pant suits. Cunningham's analysis of the history of fashion is significant because the work parallels the reform on expectations of women in social means. For example as fashion has progressed to be less "girly" and has evolved to a more diverse selection women's rights have progressed and become more accepted by society. Fashion is a social obligation for women to keep up with because women use fashion as a tool to show their personalities which is expected by society to be a personality that has deeply rooted in appearance. Fashion is a significant social obligation for women to take part in because investing in your physical appearance tells society that you have your life in order.
Cunningham, Patricia A. Reforming Women's Fashion, 1850-1920: Politics, Health, and Art. Kent, Ohio: Kent State University Press, 2003. Print.
Turabian (6th ed.)
4. Superwoman
After the feminist movements and strives for women to achieve suffrage and equality in the work force, in todays modern society it is seen as a social obligation for a women to have an occupation. However, social norms again play a role in determining which occupations are appropriate for women to take part in and which ones are not. Trautners "Doing Gender, Doing Class: The Performance of Sexuality in Exotic Dance Clubs" addresses the strip club scene and how some women are subjected to work in places like these however are seen as dirty or as lower class women. Although there is confusion whether being a stripper is female empowerment or disempowering, societies general understanding of strip clubs is negative. Occupations are supposed to be a part of a women's social obligations however judgement may result of a choice of a women's occupation, if it does not fit in with societal acceptance. Women are expected to have an occupation however the job should not take away from her other "priorities" which may include, being a mother or wife. Some occupations are also more "womanly" than others, for example secretaries, teachers and nursing are occupations that seem to be overrun by women.The generalization and stereotype that a women's emotions leave her at a disadvantage for being able to work also make it harder for a women to fulfill the social obligation of being successful. For example many people discredit Hillary Clinton and her campaign for presidency solely on the fact that she is a women and her emotions may hinder her carrying out her duties. This is significant because it is not common for a man's emotions to be questioned when pursuing an occupation however, because women are stereotyped as overly emotional they have greater difficulty pursuing their goals . A social obligation for women and people in general is to achieve a specific cultural definition of success, where in modern western worlds constitutes of financial success. Women are persuaded to work and be equal members of society as men however there are still constraints on women to keep their other social priorities straight.
Mary Nell Trautner. “Doing Gender, Doing Class The Performance of Sexuality in Exotic Dance Clubs.” Gender & Society 2005 : 771–788.
5. Soccer Moms, Dance Moms, Everything Moms
Motherhood is often seen as the number one priority for any female. Females are the only ones capable of reproducing and are seen to have motherly instincts that no man can hold. Motherhood is a social obligation that many women are inclined to take part in because of the naturalness of human reproduction, however the pressure for a women to become a mother is prevalent and is tied into conflict dealing with perspectives on abortion. Motherhood is seen as a social obligation which means a women is supposed to have "motherly" characteristics, which are established by society. Motherly characteristics include being caring, attentive and protective. The obligation for a women to be a mother is socially accepted to be a women's number one priority. Once a women enters motherhood her life is seen as forever different, as her focus shifts to the most important thing in her life, her child. Although many argue that it is a women's instinct and genuine desire to be obsessed with motherhood, society has played a role in influencing how a women views pregnancy and motherhood. Although motherhood is a social obligation, pregnancy is socially accepted under certain circumstance. Teen motherhood is often harshly looked down upon. Television shows like MTV's Teen Mom, documents the daily lives of teen moms, while some see the show as glamorizing teen moms others see it as a means of declining the harassment of teen moms by spreading their awareness. Motherhood is a significant social obligation because it is viewed and celebrated as one of the greatest events however, only so under accepted circumstances. However,motherhood is a social obligation that places women at a disadvantage because it allows their sex, being female and able to reproduce, to determine how they function as individuals in society. Ridgeway and Correll's, "Motherhood as a Status Characteristic" address the impact motherhood has on a working women. Motherhood is often a drawback to women because they are left in a complicated position when dealing with occupations and their career paths. Ridgeway and Correll argue that gender plays a role in discriminating ones role in society due to their social obligations, which in this context would be motherhood.
Ridgeway, C. L. and Correll, S. J. (2004), Motherhood as a Status Characteristic. Journal of Social Issues, 60: 683–700. doi: http://10.1111/j.0022-4537.2004.00380.x
6. Why Aren't You Straight?
Social institutions have heteronormalized social obligations for women.For example marriage a huge social obligation has historically been seen to take part between a men and women. The gender binary between men and women is often emphasized between the different social obligations they have. Because a heterosexual lifestyle is seen as todays version of "normal" and a women is obligated to live a "normal" life, a heterosexual lifestyle is often the path women take. Social pressures to be heterosexual influences the decisions of many women. The harassment and alienation of a homosexual is pressure for women to follow and conform to the "norms" dealing with sexuality. The heteronormative privilege that many women do not notice because of how strongly it is engrained in the eyes of society also plays a role in establishing heterosexuality as the norm. Homosexuals often face harassment and alienation because they are seen as out of the norm by taking part in a "new trend", although homosexuality has been prevalent for hundreds of years. In the "Compulsory Heterosexuality" Adrienne Rich argues, that people are conditioned to believe they are heterosexual, however on average people are usually not entirely heterosexual or homosexual. Conforming to societal norms which includes activities that celebrate and deal with heterosexuality, is a social obligation for women because heterosexuality is stereotyped to be associated with femininty. Sex and gender are intertwined and "womanly" characteristics are stereotyped for her to like men. Being a heterosexual is social obligation for women because it aids them in carrying out other social obligations with ease without facing scrutiny.
Rich, Adrienne. "Compulsory Heterosexuality and Lesbian Existence." Signs: Journal of Women in Culture and Society 5.4 (1980): 631. Print.
7. Maybe She's Born With It Maybe It's Social Forces
The media and pop culture have prioritized physical appearance as a social obligation for women. Beauty products are sold in different mediums all over the place with hundreds of brands and compelling advertisements. According to Donna Brits, "The Makeup of Our Makeup Obsession" she argues that women in society are obsessed with wearing makeup as a resource for self confidence. "Some women do 'become absorbed to the point of focusing on appearance only'" is a claim Brit makes addressing the obsession women have with makeup however more so the obsession women have with their appearance. Women are subjected to feel obligated to care about such things. The obligation women have to make sure they look presentable at all times places stress on women to conform to an ideal of beauty. Major brands like Maybelline, have catch phrases like "Maybe she's born with it, maybe its Maybelline" hinting at the concept that you are either born beautiful or you have to figure out a way to be. Makeup is used to enhance a women's beauty, however the reliance on makeup to morph someone into someone else is where the problems ensue. Makeup leads women to believe they can be someone else, makeup is the tool to help change the problems they see in themselves. Society plays a significant role in which types of makeup should be a women's number one essentials. For example, society has a very harsh point of view on acne, thus many women find using products like foundation,concealer, and powder as their go to products. Using makeup to help in covering up blemishes or "problem areas" is actually covering up a woman's true self. Society has enforced that a women's physical appearance should be a major obligation or priority in her life, which may undermine who she truly is. It is difficult to understand what a women's actual obligations would be if she was in no way impacted by social expectations.
Donna Britt. "The Makeup Of Our Makeup Obsession." The Washington Post. Washingtonpost Newsweek Interactive. 1998. HighBeam Research. 4 Aug. 2014 .
8. Girly Power
Being a feminine women is a huge social obligation for women. Femininity is often seen as defining what constitutes being a women. Betty Friedan's "The Feminine Mystique" presents the concept of a "feminine mystique" which is the expectation that a women is meant to be a housewife and genuinely wants to be. Friedan argues that there is a dramatic difference between feminism and being a women and one does not have to be feminine to be a women. Friedan supports this claim by pointing out that feminine is a term in itself that confines women to certain standards and expectations. Friedan lists the many issues that women face such as feeling out of place as to why one may not feel like they enjoy being confined to specific roles like being a housewife.Women are confined to rigid standards of femininity and if they surpass the boundaries they are often judged, harassed or labeled terms that do not actually fit their personality. Women are expected to be feminine and society is what defines the term feminine. Women are being forced to comply to societies norms, that actually complying is a social obligation.When a women does not comply she risks being rejected or harassed. For example social media celebrity Nash Grier posted a Youtube video addressing all the traits a man wants or expects from a girl. Backlash prompted him to take down the video and he issued an apology however there have been many critiques about the whole situation as addressed in TheThirdPews YouTube video. A women's sexuality is also at risk of being questioned when she does not fit the expectations of femininity. Women who comply to the rules off femininity are often stereotyped as heterosexual. Stereotypes play a huge role in establishing what a women's social obligations are, because stereotypes are often see as the guidelines for how one is expected to act.
Friedan, Betty. The Feminine Mystique. New York: W.W. Norton & Company, 1963. PDF.
9. Don't Be A Slut
Women are expected to have relationships with other females on the basis that they can relate to one another. Often times a female with many male friends is seen as a "slut" or "craving attention". The rule that a women should feel more comfortable and determined to have more female friends than male friends is a social obligation women should prioritize. For example a married women is expected to hangout with female friends in order to not risk ruining her marriage. However, there are not many rules and regulations for males to have a limited amount of female friends. The double standard that affects a women's social obligations is addressed in Kaeager and Staff's, "The Sexual Double Standard and Adolescent Peer Acceptance". Kaeager and Staff's work addresses the fact that there is a social double standard that society is in line with. Girls are often more harshly judged on their friendships and relationships with others then boys. Viewing girls and boys in different lights is solely a product of society.The media also draws on the norm that girls are subjected to hanging out with other girls. The stereotypical girls in television shows and movies emit an image that a women's social obligation is to find her own clique of friends, and on the basis of their commonalities of friendship is that they are all females. For example the desire to fit in and be apart of a girl clique is the whole plot of the movie Mean Girls. Sororities also stress the importance of "sisterhood". Sororities are social institutions that normalize the importance of sisterhood and female friendships, that leave women feeling obligated o find their own niche among a group of females. If a women does not have her niche she often feels left out or out of the loop because of the established norm of cliques.
Kaeager, Derek A.; & Staff, Jeremy. (2009). The sexual double standard and adolescent peer acceptance. Social Psychology Quarterly, 72(2), 143-164.
10. Make Me A Sandwich
A women's social obligations are constructed and impacted by the fact that the majority of societies history has been under patriarchal control. Women are seen as submissive to a patriarchal society by conforming to the norms that are often not created by women. Johnson addresses women oppression and imprisonment to society in "Patriarchy: The System". It is difficult for a women to escape her social obligations because it is seen as impossible to escape the system, the only thing one can do is work within it. Different ways to break out of the system and eliminate women feeling obligated to even have social obligations would be to establish the norm that a women should not care about how society views her. A women should not care if she is a apart of social institutions and a women should not care of how her physical appearance is being interpreted by others. Once we live in a society where people do not feel obligated to judge and label others, we can live in a society where the oppression of women does not exist in the strength that it does today. Spreading awareness of the system and how people should open up their eyes to see how they are just following the system, even men, may spark ideas and interest in breaking free from the ideas of stereotypes and norms. Women should be empowered to carry out their own personal obligations not the ones society deems as obligations or even priorities. Empowering women in itself is a social obligation.
Johnson, Allan G. The Gender Knot: Unraveling Our Patriarchal Legacy. Philadelphia: Temple University Press, 1997. Print.
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