1. Having gravy with everything.
2. Referring to complete strangers with vaguely obscure terms of endearment.
3. And referring to your nearest and dearest with moderately offensive insults.
4. Having your dinner at 12 p.m.
5. And your tea at 5 p.m.
FFS, southerners having dinner in the evening? The Northern Opinion: Tea is about 5pm-ish. Anything consumed after that is called BEER.
You didn’t even realise that was early until you had tea 'round someone else’s house.
6. Taking your top off and sunbathing in public the second the temperature pushes double figures.
7. Having a dogged determinism to avoid ever wearing a coat on a night out.
8. Partaking in lengthy debates about where "the south" begins.
9. Allowing nothing to stand between you and a pint.
10. Spending your childhood on beaches that look like this:
11. Carb-loading with a chip naan.
12. Also, adding scraps to your fish supper.
13. The ability to debate at length the correct name for one of these:
14. Having the aforementioned roll, bap, cake, barm etc. on the side of your tea.
15. Talking to strangers like it's nothing.
16. Your mum having a "good" tablecloth/gravy jug/apron reserved for special occasions.
17. Telling it like it is.
18. Serving beer with a head.
19. A near biblical obsession with brown stuff in a bottle.
20. Using "Alright" as a catch-all phrase.
21. And "Proper" as a qualifier.
22. Bus drivers who wave at each other.
A bus driver of the same route didn't wave at the driver of the bus I'm on. We're all shook.