6. You’ve organised your life around watching a reality show.
“Okay so it’s not that I don’t want to hang out, I do, I just… I really need to know what’s going on with Teresa and Joe Giudice because, you know, they’re up against all those federal charges and I… I just really need to see how it plays out. How’s Friday for you though?”
11. You have a strong opinion on every celebrity topic from Kylie Jenner’s possibly-enhanced lips to whether Leo will ever win an Oscar.
“You think JELENA belong together? You’re delusional, I can’t even believe you just said that tbh, they’re such a mess together.”
12. You own at least one piece of clothing with a celebrity’s face on it, and you wear it unironically.
“Yes, I am wearing a shirt with a photo of Britney, Method Man and Redman hanging out together on it, would you like to hear the story about how this photo came to exist because I can literally tell you right now if you’ve got the time.”
14. This hits a little too close to home:
18. You’ve attended a convention with the sole purpose of meeting a celebrity, or paid an exorbitant amount of money for a meet and greet before a concert.
Standing in line: “OhmyGodohmyGodohmyGodohmyGod.”
During the meet and greet: “Hi… *photograph* I love you, bye!”
Picking up your photo: “*sigh* SO worth it. They’re everything.”
19. You suspect that if you ever unexpectedly had a chance to say more than a sentence to your favourite celebrity, it would go something like this:
Honey: “Oh God, this is one of those key moments in life, when it’s possible you can be really genuinely cool and I, I’m going to fail just a hundred percent! I- I absolutely, totally and utterly adore you… and I just think you are the most beautiful woman in the world. And more importantly, I genuinely believe, and I’ve believed for some time now, that *laughs* that we could be best friends!”
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