1. When he was OK with being the ~fairest~ of them all.
When you have my skin, every day is #BurningMan
2. The time he rooted for the greatest political underdog.
Before we completely write him off as a joke, why don’t we at least find out more about the foreign policy experience of Deez Nuts?
3. When he gave Bette Midler a science lesson.
“Wind Beneath My Wings” is a great song, but what about the wind ABOVE her wings? It’s technically just as important for lift. #Physics
4. When he discussed important fiscal matters.
The country of Greece is considering dropping the euro and going with the gyro.
5. The time he shared this fun and factual historical tidbit.
On this date in Ancient Rome, Caesar was brutally killed moments after inventing the salad.
6. When the next action star was crowned.
Hugh Jackman says the next X-Men movie will be his last time playing Wolverine. Your claws await, Dame Judy Dench.
7. When he envisioned everyone as Joffrey.
With “Game of Thrones” over, now I spend Sunday nights imagining my favorite characters on other shows getting killed.
8. When he did some self-reflecting.
Looking back on my life so far, I’m proud to say I’ve only committed speakable horrors.
9. When he pointed out that religious figures are actually relatable AF.
God would have created the Earth in just 1 day, but first He decided to “just check” Facebook.
10. When he proved he was fluent in Español.
“Gazpacho” is Spanish for “no microwave.”
11. When he and Nicki shared a little R&R.
Spending a quiet evening at home, just me and my Nicki Minaj wax figure.
12. When he served this solid pick-up line.
Ladies, I’m 6 foot 4 inches of misplaced confidence.
13. When he was patiently waiting for Netflix to add more political content.
Nobody spoil the presidential race for me – I’m planning to just binge-watch it in 2017.
14. When he noticed Oscar the Grouch was ahead of his time.
The set of “Sesame Street” is being updated to reflect the modern times. Now everyone is going to live in a trash can.
15. When he was just right.
Still trying to find a problem that cheese can’t fix.
16. When he made Siri his wing woman.
Siri, where my bitches at?
17. When he made being gangster a crafty hobby.
Gangs are now facing off online. You can hear more about it in Dr. Dre’s new album, “Straight Outta Etsy.”
18. When he refused to get with the times.
The word “awesomesauce” is now in the dictionary. Call me old fashioned but I’m going to stick with “sperm.”
19. When he felt the wrath of Yeezy.
Kanye West just ran up, grabbed my “World’s Greatest Dad” mug, and gave it to a more deserving recipient.
20. And when tremors took Vegas shows to the next level:
An earthquake hit Las Vegas. 1,200 Elvises were all shook up.
Don't ever change, Coco!
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