1. You refer to anything and anyone you don’t like as pretentious.
2. You still make fun of gingers, even though that episode of South Park premiered nearly six years ago.
3. You once moved all of the yogurt to the fiction section.
4. You found one of the 500 existing copies of Godspeed You! Black Emperor’s F#A#∞ on vinyl, and you gave it to your dog to use as a chew toy.
5. You host a talk show where you use a blackboard to teach adults history.
6. More signs that you’re a pretentious asshole…
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