4. None of your clothes fit anymore.
For better or for worse, depending on how much money is in your bank account.
5. You actually crave healthy food.
MMMM, nothing like a giant bowl of crisp, delicious roughage.
8. Your healthy habits are starting to rub off on everyone around you.
The people who once shamed you for avoiding the fried chicken at the Super Bowl party and heading to the gym instead of happy hour are now asking you for advice on how to live their lives.
10. You realize there are veins you never knew existed.
You are a Master of Vascular.
11. You can actually hear your body talk.
If you eat something disagreeable or get a little less sleep than usual, your body knows what’s up because it is no longer a den of garbage.
12. The combination of endorphins and confidence results in the best sex of your goddamned life.
The best things in life make you sweaty.
13. You’ve never had to deal with this much dirty laundry.
And if you don’t keep on top of it, you risk everything you own smelling like ass sweat.
14. Two words: mental clarity.
All that mucilage sloshing around in your brain has been miraculously siphoned out and replaced with the lyrical sound of your own thoughts.
15. BIGGER AND BETTER POOPS FTW.
You’ve never known true catharsis until now.
16. You get hangovers after one beer.
Ohhhhhhh god. Guess you’re NOT going to the gym today.
20. Fresh air never felt so good.
Going outside and really breathing it all in gives you a renewed sense of self, now that you’re hyperaware of the air flowing through your body.
21. Your newfound addiction to working out has helped you kick all your other vices.
Now that you actually work out your lungs, it no longer feels good to fill them with toxic smoke.
22. Your skin hasn’t looked this good since you were in elementary school.
Regularly working up a sweat has really sucked your pores clean.
23. The realization that you’ve reached the threshold where working out is not a chore — you legitimately enjoy it.
The old you would never have believed you, but working out is FUN now that all your hard work has paid off.
And that’s all the motivation that you need.
- President Trump said he will skip the White House correspondents' dinner. On Friday, he called the media "the enemy of the people."