10 Signs That You Are Secretly In Love With Your Sworn Enemy

Based on the ridiculous, dysfunctional yet extremely functional, relationship between Beatrice and Benedick of Much Ado About Nothing. (Okay so there are 11 things in this list but who's complaining?)

1. You find yourself running out of bad things to say about them

BENEDICK

"I would my horse had the speed of your to gue and so good a continuer, but keep your way, in God's name, I have done."

BEATRICE

"You always end with a jade's trick. I know you of old." (1.1.139)

-Benedick comments on Beatrice's unwilligness to give up the argument and does so himself. She takes this as a chance to insult him once more and allude to a past, failed relationship of his...

2. Alternatively, you can't stop finding the bad in them

BENEDICK

"God keep you Ladyship still in that mind, so some gentleman or other shall escape a predestinate scratched face."

BEATRICE

"Scratching could not make it worse an 'twere such a face as yours were." (1.1.131)

-Beatrice and Benedick formulate their own little world while they banter and throw insults. They seem to be constantly pulled toward this world, taking every possible oppurtunity to slander the other.

3. You cannot stop talking about them, even if it is complaints

BEATRICE (about Benedick)

"Why, he is the prince's jester: a very dull fool; only his gift is in devising impossible slanders: none but libertines delight in him; and the commendation is not in his wit, but his villany; for he both pleases men and angers them, and them they laugh at him and beat him" (2.1.522)

-Beatrice and Beendick seemingly pick arguments out of thin air and take every chance they can to let everyone know how much they loath (cough cough love) each other. Talking about Claudio and Hero? Storytime: We despise each other.

Here, Benedick is masked and believes Beatrice does not know that it is him, although it is implied that she does. She takes her chance to hurt him while he is unable to hurt her back.

4. You take the time to make up dumb nicknames for each other

BEATRICE

"I pray you, has Signor Montanto returned from the wars or no?" (1.1.25)

...

BENEDICK

"My dear Lady Disdain. Are you yet living?" (1.1.95)

-When word first comes that the men are on their way to Messina, Beatrice calls Benedick by the name of "Signor Montanto". A montanto is a fencing term, meaning that Beatrice is likely insulting his fencing skills or lack thereof. Later on Benedick calls Beatrice "Lady Disdain" basically calling her scornful. Both go out of their way to make it known that they dislike each other to the point where it is ineveitable that they'll get together at some point.

5. Even their friends talk about the two of you...

DON PEDRO

"What was it you told me of to-day, that your niece Beatrice was in love with Signior Benedick?" (2.3.909)

...

BENEDICK

"It seems her affections have their full bent: Love me! why, it must be requited ... They say the lady is fair; tis a truth I can bear them witness; and virtuous, tis so, I cannot reprove it; and wise, but for loving me; be my troth, it is no addition to her wit, nor no great argument of her folly, for I will be horribly in love with her." (2.3.1026)

-Benedick overhears his friends taking about Beatrice and himself. Though the conversations that Don Pedro and Co. make up, they still evoke emotion out of Benedick. Benedick says he would be a fool not to love her, after all she is swooning after him right?

6. Even your friends talk about you two..

URSULA

"But are you sure / That Benedick loves Beatrice so entirely?"

HERO

"So says the Prince and my new-trothed lord." (3.1.38)

...

BEATRICE

"What is this fire in mine ears? Can this be true? Stand I condemned for pride and scorn so much? Contempt, farewell, and maiden pride, adieu! No glory lives behind the back of such. And Benedick, love on; I will requite thee, taming me wild heart to thu loving hand." (3.1.113)

-When Beatrice overhears Hero and Ursula talking about her, she is offended that they would call her prideful and scornful. In her pride, however, she vows to love Benedick and show the girls what's up.

7. You start to notice how single you are

BEATRICE

"I had rather hear a dog bark at a crow than a man swear he loves me." (1.1.129)

...

BENEDICK

"Because I will not do them the wrong to mistrust any, I will do myself the right to trust none .. I will live a bachelor." (1.1.239)

-Benedick and Beatrice both seemingly love being on their own. They have their freedoms (and their pride) and they refuse to give it up. For anyone.

8. You start to talk trash about other people's relationships

BENEDICK (To Claudio)

"But I hope you have no intent to turn husband, have you?" (1.1.197)

-Benedick constantly prod and pokes Claudio about being in love with Hero, claiming that love isn't good for anything. Beatrice also encourages Hero to forget Claudio and become a nun or just do what she wants.

9. You can't make up you mind about what you really want

BEATRICE

"He that hath a beard is more than a youth and he that hath no beard is less than a man: and he that is more than a youth is not for me and he that is less than a man, I am not for him." (2.1.426)

-Beatrice claims that a man without a beard is too young for her, while a man with a beard is too old for her, basically ruling out all men in existence. Benedick on the other hand has a better grio in what he wants, he gives a whole speech on it.

10. You end up writing cheesy poetry for them

BENEDICK

"Marry, I cannot show it in rhyme. I have tried. I can find out no rhyme to 'lady' but 'baby' ... No, I was not born under a rhyming planet, nor I cannot woo in festival terms." (5.2.36)

...

CLAUDIO

"And I'll be sworn upon it that he loves her, for her's a paper written in his own hand, a halting sonnet of his own pure brain, fashibed to Beatrice."

HERO

"And here's another, writ in my cousin's hand, stolen from her pocket, containing her affection unti Benedick," (5.4.89)

-Benedick and Beatrice both attempt to write poetry for each other and later get teased for it. Though it is not something they previously endorsed or even know how to do, they attempt it anyway

11. When it comes down to it, you would do anything for the other (Even challenge your bestie to a fight to the death)

BEATRICE

"I love you with so much of my heart that none is left to protest.

BENEDICK

"Come, bid me do anything for thee."

BEATRICE

"Kill Claudio." (4.1.300)

-Though it takes Beatrice claiming she'll die to fully convince him, Benedick would kill Claudio if it means helping Beatrice avenge her cousin. Even though they tease and banter, Beatrice and Benedick would still drop everything to help the other.