NormanBirnbach

I'm a freelance writer and humorist who has published dozens of articles in a range of print and online newspapers and magazines including The New York Times, The New York Times Magazine, The Wall St. Journal, Boston Globe, Boston Herald, New York Daily News and Barnes and Noble's "Grin & Tonic."

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  • A teddy bear taking a selfie
  • A wooden post sticking out of the grass
  • A rainbow unicorn with an arrow pointing upward for a horn
  • A little cowboy with a big 'number one' hat crying for joy
  • Moses wearing sunglasses holding a list article carved into a tablet
  • Clipboard with a piece of paper on it that says 'do it to em', 'get stuff done', and 'be a legend'
  • The number one hundred thousand under a small green monster
  • The number two hundred and fifty thousand under an alien
  • The number five hundred thousand amongst a forest of eyeballs
  • The number one million on the earth, being watched by a planet sized eyeball
  • A person with their palms facing forward, wearing an uncooked turkey on their head
  • Butterflies flying around a pair of lips
  • A body builder cat flexing with 2022 written across its pecs
  • Snow White smiling serenely while looking at a bird that is perched on her hand
  • The golden snitch flying through the air
  • A green slime splatter
  • K-pop 'finger heart'
  • Funky disco dancer
  • A cat looking startled to see a human dressed as a cat eating from its bowl, labelled "Karen"
  • Two slimy tentacles touching and forming a heart shape
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  • 20 Days That Either Served, Shouldn't Have Served Or Should Never Serve As A Major Plot Point In A Hollywood Movie

    Hollywood has turned a lot of days -- mostly holidays -- into plot points for movies. Some have been terrific and some have been blockbusters (they're not always the same). Meanwhile a lot should never have been made -- and others have yet to be made into movies, and we hope they never are. Check out our list for the top day-related movies along with those that we wished had never been produced and others we hope remain to never be green-lighted.

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