On Monday, Burger King announced its latest food item: The Whopperrito, aka a Whopper suffering from a severe identity crisis.
I knew I had to get my hands on this culinary curiosity and try it for myself. And while I was at it, I wanted to get the expert opinion of someone who's been cooking and eating Mexican food her whole life: My mom.
We got ourselves two Whopperritos from the local Burger King for $2.99 and we — correction, I — couldn't WAIT to bite into this beautiful monstrosity.
So, I tried the Whopperrito first and it was WAY better than I ever expected. That doesn't mean I liked it, but it solidly landed at a mediocre “Maybe When I’m High AF.”
I'm not mad at this. As someone who has many a time wandered drunkenly into Burger King at 3 a.m., I can understand the desire of wanting to eat a burrito that tastes like a Whopper...maybe.
My mom, on the other hand, has never done that (to my knowledge at least). So, when I asked for her expert opinion as a Mexican food connoisseur, she didn't say anything. Instead, she made what can only be described as a disapproving grunt.
"Mmmmmm...rrrrrr." — My mom.
"Where are the beans? Where's the rice? Where's the pico de gallo? Where's the avocado? Where's the cilantro? Where are the onions? Where's the chile serrano? I DON'T SEE ANY OF THAT," she told me as if I had anything to do with this concoction.
"People my age do not eat this stuff. We have respect for tradition!" she told me. "What tradition is that?" I asked. "The tradition of GOOD BURRITOS!"
"I never want ANYTHING to do with this! I swear!"
Overall, if you're into burritos that are made with hamburger meat, yellow American cheese, pickles, lettuce, and tomatoes, then THE WHOPPERRITO IS FOR YOU! As for us...
...we aight.
