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18 Secrets Men With Big Bellies Won't Tell You

Spoiler: We're proud of them.

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1. When you take off your shirt in the morning, you can't help but gaze at this thing that's on your abdomen, wondering how the hell it got there.

"Hello, belly. You're still here, I see."

2. Every once in awhile you like to grab your belly, just to see how much you have to burn off at the gym.

I'm doing an extra ten sit ups just for this.

3. You will always try to suck your belly in, especially when you're around someone you like.

4. Sitting down is the bane of your existence.

You just can't hide it when you're sitting down.

5. Getting up can sometimes be a struggle because, you know, your belly is in the way.

American Zoetrope

If getting out of bed is a struggle, doing sit-ups is the apocalypse.

6. Slapping your belly is actually kinda fun and soothing.


Some people like massages, others like slapping their belly. So be it.

7. You will inevitably find yourself playing with your belly in private.

Your belly is not going anywhere so you might as well have fun with it.

8. Your belly can sometimes be an asshole and flat out reject your clothing.

Belly: "Umm. NO!"

9. You giant belly is and will always be your first line of defense.

10. Just because your go to the gym to lift weights doesn't mean your belly is going away.

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11. Somehow, you could totally relate to the "truffle shuffle" even if you've never done it in your life.

Warner Bros.

12. The Pillsbury Dough Boy set a bad precedent allowing people to touch your belly for their personal amusement.

A disservice to bellies all over.

13. Wearing tight clothing makes you want to crawl into hole and never come out.

Teacher: "Class! We're going to be performing a Shakespearean play for the entire school!"

Me and my belly: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!"

14. The feeling of your pants tucking into your belly is just THE WORST!

15. After eating a big meal, you really don't want to unbutton your pants, but you do it anyways and it feels great.

Getty Images/iStockphoto Kenishirotie

16. Your doctor will always give you a dirty look the second you take off your shirt.

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17. You totally make fun of people who have six packs.

18. Your pot belly will inevitably become your friend, whether you like it or not.

20th Century Fox

It's always there through thick and thin. No matter where you go, it'll ALWAYS be there.

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